Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 74450 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 372(@200wpm)___ 298(@250wpm)___ 248(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 74450 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 372(@200wpm)___ 298(@250wpm)___ 248(@300wpm)
No more hiding away. I’m here now.
“I’m out here tryna spend time with my cousin, help you get a job, get on your feet, get your damn teeth fixed, and eventually your own apartment, and he is constantly callin’ and cock blockin’. Now, somethin’ has to give. Do you like bein’ treated like this, Noah? Do ya?!”
“…No.” Noah slowly met eyes with him.
Caspian pulled his phone out and dialed Uncle Bobby. After the third ring, the old man answered.
“Hello?”
“Uncle Bobby, Noah ain’t comin’ home right now. I’ve got some errands to run today and want him to tag along. Bye.”
“Hold on! Wuh? Huh? I need you to bring him home right now, Caspian.”
“And why’s that?”
The old man was quiet for a while on the other end, no doubt fishing up a lame excuse to cast his way. To present it as the lying catch of the day.
“Because this house needs to be picked up. I can’t find my medicine and—”
“He ain’t your wife, your maid, or your cook. This man is your son, and he’s out with his cousin right now. Your medicine is where it always is. On the kitchen counter by the bread. I already hired a housekeeper for you. She’ll be there tomorrow, and you know it. She comes once a week, like clockwork.”
“She been in here stealin’! I don’t want her back.”
“Stealin’ what, Uncle Bobby?! You ain’t got shit! If you’re hungry, I’ll use Uber Eats and have somethin’ delivered for you. Now, what do you want?”
The man grunted, cursed, and mumbled under his breath.
“…I want a pizza and some wings. Large Pepsi. Side salad.”
“Dressing?”
“…Ranch.”
“Fine. I’ll take care of it. Don’t call him anymore today unless it’s an emergency, ya hear me? Enough is enough.”
“You’ve got some nerve bringin’ your Yankee Doodle Dandy ass back home after all of this time and tryna be king of the mountain! You think all those fancy degrees you got make you elegant or somethin’? Well, they don’t! You’re still the same nutcase goth Satan boy you were back then. So what you’ve got some money and fancy cars now? Big whoop tee fuckin’ do! Settin’ fires on people’s porches ’nd shit, threatenin’ to slit folks’ throats for lookin’ at you and your weirdo friends wrong.”
“They weren’t threats.”
“I don’t know what that’s supposed to mean, but I’m not fuckin’ around with you, boy. I saw you flickin’ that lighter back ’nd forth after my wife’s funeral. You must’ve done it a hundred times!”
“She wasn’t just your wife; she was my Aunt Angel, and Noah’s mama. My second mama. I’m surprised you can count past ten, let alone up to a hundred, you lazy piece of shit. Does it exhaust ya once you reach number thirty? All that hard brain work?”
“Brain work? Ain’t you one to talk. Thinking about setting more fires like you used to as a kid, aren’t cha? You’re sick! An arsonist! A vicious, creepy kid! I had to sleep with one eye open when you were a teenager. I told Aunt Angel you needed to be committed but she wouldn’t listen. You got somethin’ wrong with your brain, like your mama had. I see you haven’t changed a bit! The real you has emerged again! You and your friends made me sick!”
“What do my friends have to do with this discussion?”
“Everything! They were a bad influence then, and they’re a bad influence now. One of them come callin’ here a couple times looking for you since you’ve been back in town. That tall, skinny guy with the blond hair who was always lookin’ out the corner of his eye like some deranged serial killer, what was his name? He had the crazy daddy from the mountains that always made up stupid stories, and then there was that funny lookin’ hip hop rap kid you hung with who dressed and talked like a colored person. The mutt Spanish boy with the freckles. His mama was a whore who never met a white cock she liked! A bunch of Speedy Gonzales Mexicans ran through her beaver like it was Taco Bell! Between her legs was the damn border as far as they were concerned! You three were hoodlums! Crazy, especially YOU!”
Caspian burst out laughing, sincerely tickled by his uncle’s rantings. “You were a horrible son to your aunt, always in the middle of some shit, giving her panic attacks, and we were doin’—”
“I would kill you if it wouldn’t make Noah sad. I would wrap my hands around that fat fuckin’ neck of yours and watch the life seep out of you like air from a perforated balloon… Now you pipe. The fuck. Down.” He spoke just loud enough for only his uncle to hear. “Your Uber Eats will be there soon, motherfucker. Don’t choke on it.” Caspian ended the call abruptly, got to his feet, and began clearing their table.