Total pages in book: 14
Estimated words: 12956 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 65(@200wpm)___ 52(@250wpm)___ 43(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 12956 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 65(@200wpm)___ 52(@250wpm)___ 43(@300wpm)
Or maybe they weren’t.
By the time Thursday rolled around, I’d either been fucked or rejected by half the valley, and I still hadn’t found anyone who could possibly be my dream guy. I was running out of condoms and patience.
“I’m starting to think you might be giving yourself a sex addiction,” my friend Rocco said calmly Thursday morning over coffee.
I shifted uncomfortably on my chair. “Ironic, isn’t it?”
He took another sip and stretched his legs out before crossing them at the ankles. “How do you mean?”
We were sitting in the small kitchen of the vacation home we’d rented halfway up the ski mountain. Rocco had a coffee, a store-bought danish, a dish of almonds, and the remnants of three pieces of fruit in front of him. I had one small bowl of greek yogurt and muesli, but I was eyeballing the danish like a slavering wolfhound.
“All I want is a real relationship. The big love. Someone who shares my passion for movement and meditation, helping others, enjoying the outdoors. I want someone who’s kind and caring, gentle, understanding.” I sighed and stabbed my spoon into the yogurt in dissatisfaction. “But it’s impossible to find.”
And time was running out.
Rocco nodded and set down his mug. “Babe, and I mean this with all due respect, it is impossible to find when you’re only looking for it on Grindr.”
I hadn’t told him about the to-do list or my plan. That would have been humiliating. But he knew I was looking for love, and it was becoming clear to both of us I was looking in all the wrong places.
“Yeah. I just thought… maybe there’d be somebody else on there who was like me, you know? Someone who was looking for the same things I’m looking for.”
“Enlightenment and incredible head?”
“No!” I grabbed an almond from Rocco’s bowl and threw it at him. He caught it with annoyingly quick reflexes and popped it in his mouth with a grin. I plunked my elbows on the table. “Actually… Yeah. That’s exactly what I want. I want to root out the one gay guy in Aster Valley who has a giant heart… and, let’s be honest, a giant dick wouldn’t go amiss.”
He laughed and tossed a handful of almonds in his mouth, crunching happily before responding. “Now we’re talking. You want a guy who has it all. The heart and the bedroom skills.”
I shot him a grin. “Bingo. Is that too much to ask?”
He stood up and shoved a big hunk of the pastry into his mouth. If only he didn’t live in Alaska, I’d consider him seriously despite his “no coworker hookups” rule. But he was married to his hometown, and I was married to never moving to small-town Alaska.
“Not too much to ask in general. In fact, you shouldn’t settle for less. But why the rush to find Mr. Perfect this week? Just relax and enjoy yourself while you’re here. Plenty of time for true love once you get home,” he advised. “Your chances have to be better there than in a small town like this anyway.”
I nodded half-heartedly. Rocco meant well, but he was wrong. And he clearly hadn’t spent much time in Jackson Hole, Wyoming.
I knew for a fact that the guy with the to-do list lived in Aster Valley. If I couldn’t manage to find him this week, I had no hope of finding him later. It was enough to make me feel a little bit panicked.
“Help me on the slopes today,” Rocco said around a mouthful of delicious trans fats. “I need an experienced videographer getting B-roll. Give your ass a break, and come with me.”
I sighed and stood up. “Fine. But I’m not an expert skier.”
“You live in Jackson. You teach yoga at a ski resort.”
“I can ski, okay? I just said I’m not an expert. I don’t ski backwards and do trick shit like that. But I’ll do my best.”
Rocco handed me the last piece of his danish. “That’s all I ask. I’ve got a pro skier to do the backwards skiing. I just need you to get wider angles and pretty views. I’ll pay you in junk food.”
I winked at him. “Man after my own cholesterol-compromised heart.”
When we got to the mountain, I had to admit Rocco was right. I’d needed to get outside. The sun was shining, and the cold air was fresh and clean. It felt good to stretch my muscles. To clear my head and regain some perspective.
When Rocco had originally posted in our SocialAdrenaline content creator forum that he was going to be in Aster Valley filming classes on the mountain, I’d seen it as a sign. I’d told Rocco I’d split the cost of the rental and help him shoot his classes if he’d help me shoot mine, but the trip had mostly been an excuse to go to Aster Valley and sniff around for my mysterious list writer. I’d scoped out a meadow on the backside of the mountain, and Rocco had already helped get permission from the mountain owner to let me access it to film a sunrise yoga class; I just hadn’t actually done it yet.