Sincerely Up Yours – Grumpy Boss Comedy Read Online Penelope Bloom

Categories Genre: Contemporary, Funny, Romance Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 92
Estimated words: 85593 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 428(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
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“But you’re amazing at your job. They wouldn’t fire you. I-” I stammered, hands lifting uselessly as I looked around the small office, as if there might be some clue in neon letters on the wall. “I don’t understand.”

“We’ve been acquired, Darcy. The Squawker is owned by three investors who bought it from the original founder forty years ago. They’re all getting older, and a wealthy businessman made them a generous offer to sell. It’s that simple. I just found out this morning. My options were to report to this new asshole who calls himself our boss, or resign.” She slammed a jar of pens into her box with a shrug. “And I’m not about to lick somebody’s boots. So it’s greener pastures for me.”

She hoisted the box of things and then paused when she saw what must’ve been the dejected, wounded puppy look on my face.

“Hey, I know,” she said. “This sucks. It really sucks. You were coming in here to pitch your feature to me and I’m sure I was going to approve it. But that’s careers for you. They don’t ever seem to go the way we expect. If you want a recommendation, just let me know. I’m sure I’ll land on my feet somewhere, and I’d love to have you come join me.”

With one last pinched smile, she headed out and left me alone in her office, head spinning.

It felt like a ghost was using me as a punching bag. Everything inside hurt and I couldn’t seem to catch my breath. The Squawker was acquired? How was that even possible? Except she’d explained exactly how it was possible, I just…

I took a deep, shaky breath and shook my head. Did I want to follow after her? I could resign too and maybe land somewhere more prestigious next time around. I knew my dad would approve, but what did I want?

I flopped down in the chair beside her desk, running through my thoughts.

What the hell did I want?

The answer came straight away. I admired the hell out of Jasmine, but I didn’t want to do what she was doing. She was giving up and running. I had my fair share of setbacks, even at my young age. I didn’t want to run from this one. I put two years of my life into this magazine, and I believed in the weekly feature I was going to pitch to Jasmine. So, no, I wasn’t going to quit.

I was going to thrive, dammit. Besides, my new boss was probably going to be a reasonable person. All I needed to do was convince the new boss my weekly feature was worth pursuing, and things wouldn’t really change that much, right?

I felt like I was in a daze when I left Jasmine’s office. Elizabeth saw the look on my face, then followed my eyes to Jasmine, who was waiting for the elevator with her bin of things. She came to me slowly, features slowly forming a wince.

“Yeah,” she said, reaching up to give my shoulder a comforting touch. “I heard.”

I nodded. Elizabeth was our best comedic voice. Sometimes she helped inject a little humor into our more stale pieces. Unsurprisingly, she was usually just as hilarious in everyday life as she was on the page. She was barely over five and a half feet tall and wore bright blue glasses to match her hair.

“Yeah,” I said with a sigh. “It’s okay, though.”

“Look on the bright side,” Elizabeth said. “I saw the new boss. Even if he’s completely clueless, he’s fucking delicious. I just about offered him up all my eggs for breeding the moment he stepped out of that elevator. He was glaring and god, it looked like he was about to hate fuck the first thing that walked in front of him. I was very close to offering myself as tribute, Katniss Everdeen style.”

“Wait,” I said, connecting the dots as my stomach sank even further. Any more stomach sinking today and the damn thing was going to fall out of my ass. “Was this new boss you saw wearing a blue suit?”

“Blue, black, yellow. I have no freaking idea. My ovaries were practically pushing my eyes out of the way to get a look at him. It was really just a blur of sexy fog.”

“Where is he now?” I asked, looking around. I noticed then how the whole office was in a rare hush. People had gathered into groups of two and three as they leaned their heads together, whispering at their stations.

“He went into the conference room. My guess is we’re going to get summoned for a meeting. Would I be too much of a hoe if I let him see up my skirt during the meeting? You know, long range warfare? Although I’m wearing some ratty ass panties today. Damn. Can I borrow yours?”



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