Shame Me Not Read Online Fiona Cole

Categories Genre: Angst, BDSM, College, Erotic, New Adult, Romance, Young Adult Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 124
Estimated words: 115263 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 576(@200wpm)___ 461(@250wpm)___ 384(@300wpm)
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So, when this hot chick came up to me, tugging down her already low-cut shirt, and whispered in my ear that she loved the way I played, I’d asked her to come to the local diner with some friends afterward. Her hand had been glued to my upper thigh through the whole meal and her pinky ventured higher on each sweep. I almost jumped out of my seat when she got brave enough and cupped my junk through my jeans. She’d laughed and leaned in. “Take me out to your car and let me see what feels so great under my hand.”

I’d made hasty excuses to the guys and drove to a park nearby. She was bold, and maybe I’d let myself go a little too far and enjoy the feel of so much attention, but halfway through, I’d squeezed her hips tight, loving the way her soft flesh gave way under my fingers. Until she shouted out in pain and leveled me with an accusatory glance that punched me right in the chest. She must have thought I was a monster. An abuser.

The wave of disgust in myself washed over me, making me go soft. I’d needed out of that car and away from the girl. I’d ended up faking an orgasm and getting her off with my hand and taking her home. She gave me her number, but I had no intention of calling her. She’d left a lasting mark on my self-confidence. I didn’t need another go.

Plus, I’d only given in to her because she went to another school. If anything had gotten out about me and how I’d acted with her, I had a chance of it not spreading like wildfire that the senator’s son was a freaky, abusive asshole. We’d had enough scandal at our school. I hadn’t wanted to add to it.

“Hey, the girls are here,” Isaac’s voice distracted me from my thoughts. I looked up into the stands and saw Jane, Gwen, Chloe, and Ana watching the scrimmage. I waved at Ana and tried not to be disappointed when she quickly turned her attention to Sean. He was her boyfriend, and she seemed happy. If I was a good friend, I’d swallow my jealousy and be supportive of my two closest friends. Instead, I clenched my fists and forced myself to turn back to the game.

I was a fucking mess.

We scrimmaged three more rounds before practice ended. As I approached the bench to collect my bag, I heard one of the guys on the team talking to Sean.

“You going to ask her?”

“Hell yeah, I am.” Sean cleared the metal bench, shoving equipment and backpacks to the ground, then climbed up on it.

“Ana,” he shouted. “My teddy bear. Apple of my eye. Sun in my sky. The beat to my heart. The syrup to my pancakes.”

“That doesn’t even make sense,” Isaac murmured below him.

Sean gave him a shove with his foot before continuing.

“Will you do me the greatest honor of going to prom with me?”

Ana laughed along with the other girls. “You’re a mess, Sean.”

“Is that a yes? I think it’s a yes.” He looked around at us. “Guys, did you hear?” He threw his hand over his chest and bellowed, “She said yes!”

Ana shook her head. “Yes, Sean. It’s a yes.”

He hopped down from the bench and did a victory lap around the field, pumping his arms like a lunatic. Even I had to laugh.

I couldn’t be mad at him for taking up her time, because he was a good guy and he always managed to make us all laugh. Ana deserved to have a nice guy like that.

Not someone like me.

“Jane, you going to our prom with your boyfriend or his prom?” I asked, after the girls left the stands to join us on the field. Everyone paired off, except Jane and me, since we were the only ones without partners in the group.

“We broke up last month.”

“Oh. Sorry to hear that.” Although to be honest, she didn’t seem very broken up about it.

“Shit happens. I’m seventeen. It’s not like I was going to marry him.” Her answer made me wonder if asking her to prom casually could work. She didn’t seem too attached, like if I asked her she’d assume we were dating or anything. What the hell? At least if I went with her, I wouldn’t have to be alone.

“You want to go to prom together? I mean it’s not a fancy, crazy proposition like Sean’s, but I figured we could go as friends.”

I’d barely got the words out before she agreed. “Hell, yeah.”

I’d not pursued Jane because she was in our group of friends, and the more this sick desire plagued me, the more afraid I was of someone finding out. God forbid I go out with Jane and we mess around and I slip up, freak her out, and she tells everyone what a psycho I am. Then what? They’d probably all accuse me of being an abusive dick. It was bad enough that I’d already lost control with Ana.



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