Total pages in book: 72
Estimated words: 66074 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 330(@200wpm)___ 264(@250wpm)___ 220(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 66074 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 330(@200wpm)___ 264(@250wpm)___ 220(@300wpm)
Fake or not, I have absolutely zero desire to touch anyone other than my beautiful Twyla. That goes for other toys men stick their cocks in to get off. Pocket pussies, cock sleeves, and all the other male masturbators do nothing to pique my interest.
The various parts of Twyla’s irresistible body, on the other hand, is a-whole-nother story.
She’s all I’ll ever need.
“Something my wife said at the table made me realize what a shitty Dom I’ve been for her,” I confess, and my statement surprises Doc. Whether it’s because I didn’t annoy him into giving me details about the surprise or because of what I said, I can’t be sure.
And for once, I’ve struck him speechless, so I answer the question I know would be his next one.
“What did she say?” My voice lowers. “‘I must wear the hat of the bad guy who has the audacity to flat-out tell her no.’ And she wasn’t complaining. She’s never nagged me or even done anything more than point out things like ‘we play good-cop/bad-cop with our daughter, and I’m always the bad cop.’ Not with a pout on her face, mind you, but with an adoring smile. And I’m ashamed to admit that I completely overlooked the things she was really trying to tell me.”
Doc has come out of his moment of shock, so he’s gained the ability to question, “What does any of that have to do with you being a ‘shitty Dom’?”
So, I spill everything that went through my head while I sat at the dinner table. Every revelation that branched off into more realizations, I threw it all out there for him to straighten out and organize for himself, so he can do what Doc does better than anyone else I’ve ever known or heard of. Make sense of things that make no sense, and fix things that seem impossible to fix.
He's nodding, and it feels both good and awful that the conclusions I drew for myself seem to be aligning in his mind too.
He clears his throat before he speaks. “First and foremost, you need to realize you’re human, Seth.” When my eyebrow arches at him like Dwayne Johnson’s once again, while I fight the urge to roll my eyes, he continues. “Yes, Doms have an incredible amount of responsibility, and we’re damn-near expected to be these all-knowing beings who can predict the future and read minds to a supernatural degree. And you an even higher level than that. You have the highest IQ of anyone I’ve ever met, and you’ve had that fact shoved down your throat since you were five years old. On top of that, you’re known across the world to be one of the top-skilled Dominants in the country, who has been trusted by hundreds of Doms and subs to teach them how to be respectable members of this community.”
“Thousands,” I correct.
He ignores me and presses forward. “So you’ve got a battle going on inside you that you may not even realize. On one hand, you’ve got a lot of pressure on your shoulders to live up to what so many people think and say about you. On the other hand, the fact that your reputation is so positive and you hear probably every single day what an amazing Dom you are, your confidence in your role is—well-deserved and rightly—high. But… You. Are. Human. And as a mere mortal, Seth, no matter how smart and skilled and admired and reputable you are, you’re going to make mistakes. Perfection is an impossibility.”
What he said about the battle inside me rings true. Only on the outside, I put on a good front that everything I do is done without much brainpower. I’m a genius; therefore, it all comes so easily for me, right?
Wrong. So, so, very wrong.
Yes, I have a brain like a computer, but then God thought he’d add a little bit of spice—in the form of ADHD.
My computer brain has a shit load of tabs open all the fucking time. And most of the time, I think I do a pretty good job of keeping all those tabs organized. But what Doc just said makes me understand that sometimes, a few of those tabs are neglected while I focus more on others.
I feel like my Dom tab has not only been neglected but completely separated into its own window. Out of sight and out of mind.
Doc continues, “Secondly, while you take everything you just told me as something wholly negative, it should also be viewed as a testament that… you’re happy. You’re a man who is truly, genuinely happily married and who cherishes the family he’s been given. Who loves fatherhood and cares about his little girl’s feelings so much he avoids hurting them even the tiniest bit. And you’re so happily married, in fact, that your role as a husband who deeply adores his wife has overtaken the other role you have in your life that was formerly the most important to you. The part of yourself that was the ‘main character’ for so long but has now taken a step back to become a—still highly important to the plot—side character.”