Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 83818 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83818 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
I tell him everything, sparing no detail. Throughout the entire conversation with my brothers, I keep Renata on my lap. She doesn’t cry, but she buries her head in my chest, her hands tucked up against herself like a small child.
It’s only after I hang up that I realize I’ve been rocking her gently as if driven by instinct.
Mikhail explains that when everything went down, my mother and sister’s guards kept them barricaded safely in their bedrooms. Thank God for that. Those guards will be getting a hefty bonus.
Renata and I sit in silence for long minutes. Finally, I ask her, "Are you okay?"
The words are too little, a drop of water in a desert, but she’s graceful and classy, as always.
"Surprisingly, yes," she replies. "You know I didn’t want to see…” her voice gets a little choked, but she swallows and continues, “that happen, but I’ve been thinking about what you said… about not holding onto who people used to be? And I realize now that my brother wasn’t the same person I grew up with anymore. He just wasn’t. Whatever." She shakes her head and exhales, her breath warm against my skin.
I gently thread my fingers through her hair, wishing I could soothe her. I wish I could make all the pain disappear for her, but I know it wouldn’t help her even if I could. She’s mine now, and this is the life we live. This is the life we will always have.
A little ball of white fluff, comes bounding through the door like an animated cotton ball. Renata sits up, and for the first time, a tear falls down her face.
“King Arthur,” she whispers. The small dog leaps into her lap, his tiny paws pressing against her chest as he licks her face mercilessly. She holds him close, whispering sweet words in Spanish, calling him her little warrior, her little buddy. I know there will come a day when this little guy actually defends and protects her, but for now, his unwavering, unconditional love brings a smile to her face. This little guy deserves a treat.
"I will always love you for getting me a puppy," she says quietly.
We don’t talk about Carlos—not then. We don’t need to.
I saw her plead with him, and I even saw his own internal struggle, as if a small part of him wanted to return to what once was. But we both knew he had sold his soul to the devil, and keeping him alive wasn’t an option. I hold her to me as she cradles the dog. "I love you, Renata. And I’m so very sorry about your brother."
“Ollie… the fact that you weren’t the one who killed him in the end means more to me than you’ll ever know."
If I had no other choice, I would have done it, but she doesn’t need to know that. Not now.
She looks thoughtful. “That man with the scar on his wrist—he saved me from Carlos back in Colombia."
I nod. “He works for us. He’ll be debriefing with my brothers later."
“Jesus. He took the risk of going undercover with Carlos?”
“Yup.”
“He’s got balls of steel,” she says with obvious admiration.
I ruffle her hair. “No talking about another man’s balls.”
“Why is he debriefing with your brothers? Why not you?"
"Because I have another job now.” I kiss her cheek. “Making sure you’re all right. You’ve just been through hell."
"I know, but I can’t explain it… I just… I feel a strange sense of relief now. I didn’t even realize how wound up I was, waiting to see what would happen with my brother. But now that he’s gone, I feel relieved. And—"
We both understand that we’re not safe, not yet. Carlos revealed he was working with someone else. Whether or not they will now come after us is still uncertain. "It feels like his death marks the end of an era, and now I can finally move on."
"I understand that completely."
I hold her in the quiet, and for long moments, neither of us speaks. So much has happened in such a short time, and we need space to process it all.
"It seems like real love means being willing to sacrifice for the other," Renata says softly. "I will give up my freedom, my independence. All of it. And I know you will protect me. I will protect you, too, and do my best by you."
I kiss her cheek. “I think truly loving each other means accepting the past, giving each other space to heal, and being willing to support one another, no matter what."
Our love has been tested by both our personal demons and the forces outside of us. But what matters now is that we respect each other and are committed to finding solutions, to compromising, to finding peace.
Footsteps sound outside the door. Isabella and Lev have arrived.