Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 92417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 462(@200wpm)___ 370(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92417 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 462(@200wpm)___ 370(@250wpm)___ 308(@300wpm)
Oh, there was a crush all right. But I let it go for now. “So let me ask you this. When you guys were all growing up, did Austin ever have a serious girlfriend?”
She exhaled and looked out the window for a moment, like she had to think hard. “Not that I recall. But Mabel and I were a lot younger. When he was in high school, we were still pretty little. I do know that once the twins arrived, he never dated anyone around here. The town biddies are always trying to set him up—my mother has tried to get him to take every single one of my cousins out—but he just doesn’t do it. If he didn’t have those kids, I might think he wasn’t that into women.”
“He’s definitely into women,” I confirmed without thinking.
Her eyes met mine and widened like full moons. “You sound very certain of that. Almost like you had inside information.”
Heat crept up my neck and into my face.
“And now you’re blushing,” she pointed out. She sipped on her straw, waiting for me to say more.
“Uh . . .” I tried to think of a way to cover for myself, but the truth was that I was dying to talk about this with someone who knew Austin. Could I trust Ari? “So this is a bit delicate.”
“I am the soul of discretion. You can ask Mabel—I was one thousand percent the better secret-keeper between the two of us.”
I hesitated. Was this okay? I mean, Xander knew, right? And Ari was like family. “Okay, but this really needs to stay between us.”
She crossed her heart.
“So ever since I met Austin, there’s been this . . .”
“Tension between you,” Ari said with a nod. “I saw it the day you came in for breakfast. And everyone saw it at The Broken Spoke.”
“Were you there that night?” I couldn’t remember seeing her.
She shook her head. “I didn’t need to be. Small town. Go on.”
“Okay. So we sort of agreed that it would be inappropriate to act on it once he hired me, but that line grew a little fuzzy once the kids left for California.”
“And by fuzzy you mean it disappeared entirely.”
I snapped my fingers. “Like that.”
“So?” Her eyes danced. “How was it?”
“So good you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” I took a breath. “So good I don’t want it to stop.”
“Why would it stop?”
“Because the kids are coming home. And we agreed from the get-go that was the finish line.”
Ari tilted her head. “Have you talked about it since?”
“Not really.” I shook the ice around in my cup. “I can’t bring myself to ask him what he’s thinking.”
“Why not?”
My fear of rejection seemed like a lot to get into right now. “I’m just worried that the answer won’t be what I want it to be.”
“I get that,” she said. “It’s scary to put yourself out there, especially if you laid out the parameters beforehand.”
“We did. That’s exactly it—we did. I’m afraid that he might get upset with me for trying to change the rules. And we’d have to sneak around behind the kids’ backs. And I’m leaving in a month anyway, you know?”
Ari thought for a moment. “Do you have to leave in a month?”
“Yes. The nanny job is over mid-August. I’m going back to New York.”
“You have a job lined up already?”
“I’m working on it.”
“I’m just wondering if there was a way you could stay here. Find a different job.”
“And live where?”
She shrugged. “Over Austin’s garage.”
I shook my head. “No. I can’t suggest that. It’s way too much.” And I would rather die than see the look on Austin’s face as he tried to let me down easy, or worse, agreed to let me stay even though he didn’t really want me to because he thought it was the right thing to do. What if he said yes because of his sense of duty? What if he felt obligated to say yes because he promised he’d never hurt me, but he didn’t really want me to stick around?
My skin started to prickle. My heart began to pound. Suddenly I felt like I couldn’t breathe, and little gray dots began to swim before my eyes. A siren went off in my head.
“Hey, are you okay?” Ari asked.
I refocused on her concerned face. “What?”
“You suddenly turned white.”
“Oh, sorry.” Closing my eyes, I inhaled and exhaled. “Just a little panic attack.”
“Need some air? Want to go outside?”
“Yeah, maybe.”
“Come on.” We got up from the table and she took my arm, leading me back out into the sunshine.
I gulped several breaths of fresh summer air—fudge. The lake. The baskets of fragrant flowers hanging off each streetlamp on Main Street. Gradually, my pulse decelerated, and my skin stopped tingling.
“Better?” she asked.
“Better.”
“I’m sorry for upsetting you. I didn’t mean to.”