Total pages in book: 166
Estimated words: 161257 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 806(@200wpm)___ 645(@250wpm)___ 538(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 161257 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 806(@200wpm)___ 645(@250wpm)___ 538(@300wpm)
Max exhaled a great big lungful of shame, remembering all the fucked-up shit he’d said. God, what a disrespectful, sadistic son of a bitch. No wonder Scott pummeled the shit out of his face. Tad never should’ve broken it up. After all, Max was only getting everything he deserved. A beat down to rival the size of his gall.
Shaking his head, he lifted his knuckles and gave Scott’s door a brisk little rap.
Knock-knock-knock—
Nothing. Well, nothing but some low-key music. Then the murmur of Scott’s voice. Sounded hushed, though.
Max frowned and knocked again. “Scott? You in there?”
“Yeah. Hold on.”
The music stopped. Scott pulled open the door a heartbeat later.
Max pocketed his hands and looked at his friend. Shit. While Scott certainly had come away from their fight far less scathed, his face still showed signs that Max had “been there.” A cut on his cheekbone and a pretty red jaw. Max’s chest clenched in remorse. Time to make amends.
Biting the bullet, he forced a tiny smile. “Hey, man… Listen, I just wanted to—” He paused, detecting movement from the corner of his eye. He glanced toward said movement. Stilled in surprise. Tad, on Scott’s bed, sitting against the headboard, half under the covers, and clearly naked. Looked like he and Scott had patched things up. “Oh. My bad. Didn’t realize you were here. I’ll just… come back later.”
“Nah.” Scott shook his head. “It’s cool. Come on in.” Max watched him walk over to join Tad on the bed. “He’s gonna be here a while, so say what you gotta say.”
Max studied them for a moment, sitting casually side by side. They looked sated—undoubtedly having just finished fucking—but they also looked utterly content. Well, Scott did anyway. Tad looked a little uneasy. Probably because of Max. He hadn’t exactly been very welcoming. Max would keep a wide birth as a peace offering. Meaning, no, he wouldn’t come in, even though Scott had invited him.
Leaning against the doorjamb, Max eyed them curiously. “You two good now? Everything’s… cool?”
Scott looked at Tad. Tad looked at Scott. “Yup.” Scott smiled. “Everything’s cool.”
“Good.” Max smiled, too. “That’s good.” And he meant it. Scott was happy, genuinely happy, his emotions palpable. And at the end of the day, that was all Max had ever really wanted.
Scott settled his hand on Tad’s knee. Tad eyed it thoughtfully. Then two seconds later, returned the gesture, even as his gaze moved to Max. The two locked stares, and there it was again; Tad’s wordless declaration that he was in it. In it with Scott, no matter what he’d have to face. That Scott was now his world. Was now his everything.
Truth be told, that look in Tad’s eyes was downright beautiful. Honest, but also incredibly brave. Something that swiftly earned him Max’s acceptance, as well as his genuine respect. Which Max would give him, willingly, until further notice—just as soon as Tad and Scott stopped fucking knifing him. Right through the ribs as they sat there so happy, reminding Max of what he’d never have.
Because his head wouldn’t allow it.
Because his heart was on lockdown.
Because he’d made up his mind and wasn’t deviating.
Chest aching, stomach knotting, Max shifted against the doorjamb
“So…” Scott was watching him, his gaze looking tentative. “There was something you wanted to say?”
Max’s muscles tensed of their own volition. “Um. Yeah… I just wanted to…” Fuck, he was fidgeting. “You know… say I’m sorry. For acting like a dickhead before.” There. He’d said it. Over the first hump. He feigned a little smirk and tested the proverbial waters. “You were just being so fucking stupid.”
Scott’s lips quirked. “Mmhmm.”
Translation: I forgive you.
Max’s heart squeezed in gratitude, but Scott deserved more. Max cleared his throat and forced out the rest. “I guess maybe I was dumping some of my frustrations on you, too. Which wasn’t cool. I just…” A painful lump welled in his throat. “I gotta lot of shit on my mind and—”
“A lot of shit?” Scott interjected. “Or a lot of someone.” God, his voice, so loaded with… pity.
Which, yup, put Max instantly on the defensive. “Just shit,” he grated, indignantly crossing his arms. “But that brings up another matter.”
Scott’s face fell. “And what’s that?”
Max squared his shoulders. Don’t think. Just say it. “I changed my mind about Kai. I’m cool with him being Sean’s Dom. Call him. Tell ’em he can have the kid.”
Something inside broke as he spoke the words, broke under the weight of what he’d just done. Of what he’d irrevocably just set into motion. The very first step of letting Sean go. Cold dread washed over him. He didn’t want to let him go. But goddamn it, all this shit was seriously messing him up. Crumbling his walls’ fucking mortar.
He swallowed and scrubbed his face. “I… God, I just can’t deal with the hassle.”