Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 83699 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83699 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
She didn’t want a few stolen minutes in her office. She didn’t want a casual relationship where he drifted into her bed and right back out again when he had another flight to catch or a TV show to shoot.
She wanted nothing less than a love like Dane and Cammie’s, like the Mavericks.
Letting this go on would break her heart. And her heart absolutely could not survive another break. Like Humpty Dumpty, she could never be completely put back together. If Ransom broke her again, she’d never be the same.
He was dressed when he returned, setting her neatly folded clothes on the vanity beside her as she pulled her hair dryer out of the drawer.
“I’ll wait for you.”
Something welled up inside her. More than fear. Maybe even terror. She turned to face him. “No. Please don’t wait. I’ll be a while.” Her voice was soft, but she hoped it wasn’t broken.
“I don’t mind,” he said with a tenderness that was like nails on a chalkboard.
“No. I really need you to go now.” The words were so low that he leaned forward to hear, his scent washing over her.
“Why?” His brow creased with utter bewilderment.
She didn’t want to sound like she was throwing him out. Or as though what they’d done hadn’t been what she’d wanted in that moment. All she could say was, “I really need some time to think.”
And even though she didn’t want to beg, she added, “Please.”
* * *
What they’d just shared had been far more than amazing. There wasn’t a word in the English language that could describe it. And yet, the crumpled look on her face and her downcast eyes spoke to her conflict. It was clear their lovemaking had meant something to her, but it was equally clear that she wasn’t ready to handle it.
He’d walked into her office and realized how badly he wanted her, how much he still loved her, that he’d never fallen out of love with her.
But she wasn’t there yet.
He could only pray she’d get there the way he had.
He tipped up her chin, held her gaze for a long moment of eye contact as he searched for more clues to what she was thinking.
But she was shuttered now.
They still had so much to talk about, and maybe he’d been an idiot for letting his desire take over. Not that he would change a moment of the last half hour. But as he looked into her beautiful eyes, as his gaze roved over her gorgeous features, his gut told him that anything he said to her in this moment would be wrong.
She drew a shuddering breath, clearly on the edge—emotional, even frightened.
If he pushed her now, she might never let him in again.
This wasn’t like the last time. He wasn’t walking away. He couldn’t let her be the one to do it either.
But he could give her time. “I understand. I’ll leave you now, and I’ll work with Naomi.” Taking her hand, he squeezed her fingers lightly. “But call me soon. We really need to talk this through. We can’t let it be like last time, where neither of us said anything.”
He leaned in to kiss her cheek, tasting the salt of a tear. Then he released her, backing out of the door and finally turning to go.
He was leaving. But he wasn’t walking away.
Chapter Nineteen
Ava’s meeting went by in a blur. Thank God Naomi took notes, as Ava, for the first time ever, couldn’t remember a thing that was said.
Had Naomi been shooting her sly glances?
But she couldn’t worry about Naomi or meetings or anything else right now. Those thirty minutes with Ransom had been an out-of-body experience. They’d been as in tune as if years hadn’t gone by. Like tactile memories on her skin, all she could think of was his touch, his kiss, his taste, and the feel of him filling up every single minute of those empty years.
His caresses had touched so much more than just her body. They’d touched her soul and her heart. God, her heart. If her heart was involved, it could be broken all over again.
When they broke up, he’d had his career to build and consume him. While he might have missed her at first, at least for a little while, he’d made his choice. And it wasn’t her. The end of their affair had blindsided her. She thought she’d been doing everything possible to make him happy, only to have him show her how he really felt before he hopped on a plane like her parents always had.
She didn’t want to be blindsided again at thirty-six. She didn’t want a repeat of all that angst and heartache. And maybe she’d channeled all her heartache into anger to ease it a little.
Yet she didn’t feel the anger anymore. These past few days with him, seeing him perform so many sweet acts—painting nails, making Myrtle laugh, stepping in to make Gideon and Rosie’s wedding the best it could be—all the old anger had drained away.