Total pages in book: 23
Estimated words: 22109 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 111(@200wpm)___ 88(@250wpm)___ 74(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 22109 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 111(@200wpm)___ 88(@250wpm)___ 74(@300wpm)
He looks so serious and damn so sexy. A part of me wants to mount him right here and right now, and the other part of me wants to cry because of how sweet he’s being. “Gray, this is too much. All of this...”
I stop because it’s so overwhelming, and I know I’m going to start bawling.
He puts the pillow under one arm and then puts his free hand on my shoulder. “Be honest. How’d you sleep last night?”
I inhale sharply. “I didn’t.”
“You haven’t slept at all?”
He’s searching my face, and insecurity settles in. I’m sure I look like crap. “No.”
He walks me to the couch. “Have a seat.”
As soon as I do, he lays the pillow down next to me. “I’ll be right back.”
He grabs the tea and kettle and disappears into the kitchen. I’m looking at the pile of stuff for the baby when he comes back a few short minutes later. “Drink this.”
He hands me the hot tea and then goes around closing all the curtains and then disappears down the hallway, opens a closet and comes back. He covers me with a blanket and then hovers over me. “Can you sleep while I’m here? Or do you want me to leave?”
I blink up at him. It’s on the tip of my tongue to beg him to stay, but instead I ask him, “Do you have somewhere you need to be?”
He shakes his head. “Nope, I’m here as long as you need me.”
I want to say forever, but I’m scared to. Even though Gray has been so good to me, I have the worst track record with men. “I’d like you to stay then. Please.”
He nods and sits down next to me. I’m thankful when he sits close and wraps his arm around me. “Just close your eyes. Relax.”
I lean my head against his shoulder and close my eyes. He lifts his arm and wraps it around me, and my head lays on his chest now. His voice is quiet and soothing. “Get some sleep. I got you, Ellie.”
Chapter 9
Gray
Lying on the couch with Ellie in my arms just feels right.
Eventually her breathing has slowed, but she surprises me when she says my name.
I rest my chin on the top of her head. “Yeah, honey.”
“Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do—”
I cut her off. “You are a survivor, Ellie. Don’t ever forget that. You can do anything.”
Her hand curls into my shirt at my waist, and I suck in a breath. Just having her this close and having her hands on me has my body reacting. “I know that, and you’re right. I am a survivor. But this, you’ve really been here for me, and even though I’m scared...”
I lean back so I can see her face, but her hands tighten on me. “No, don’t leave.”
I freeze and look at the stricken look on her face. I smooth my hand up and down her back. “Honey, I’m not going anywhere, but I have to know: What are you scared of?”
She’s conflicted, and it’s even more obvious when she shakes her head. “Forget it.”
But there’s no way I’m going to let this go. If she’s scared of something, I need to know. My stomach feels like lead wondering if she’s going to say she’s scared of me. “Talk to me. You can tell me anything. What are you scared of?”
She inhales and blows it out slowly. I don’t pressure her anymore, wanting to give her time to tell me on her own. Finally, she shakes her head. “I’m scared of this.”
She points between the two of us, and I pull back a little, not wanting to crowd her. “You’re scared of me?”
She laughs and rolls her eyes. “No, not of you. Of this. Of what’s happening between me and you.”
I shake my head because I don’t want her uncomfortable, but I don’t understand what she’s trying to say to me. “I don’t understand. Why are you scared? I wouldn’t hurt you for anything, Ellie.”
She lifts her shoulders in a shrug. “My whole life I’ve been told I’m not good enough. My parents didn’t want to deal with me...”
I start to interrupt her, and she holds her hand up. “We don’t need to sugarcoat it. It’s the truth. I was always a burden to them. I’ve never been good enough for anyone. Not Dawson—hell, I know I don’t deserve you, and then this poor baby. She or he definitely pulled the short straw to wind up with a mom like me. I can’t even work to support her.”
The tears start to flow, and I do the first thing that comes to mind. I pull her back into my arms and hold her tight. She’s sobbing, and I rub her back, wishing I could take her pain away.
It seems like forever that she cries, but in reality, I know it’s only a few minutes. When her sobs soften, I tilt her head back to look at her. I wipe my thumbs across her cheeks to dry them. Her eyes are red and swollen, but she still looks beautiful to me. “Okay, so your parents, I don’t know what their deal is, but I can’t imagine being a parent and doing what they did to you. As for Dawson, he was my best friend, and I miss him like crazy, but, hell, Ellie I don’t know how to say it but just say it. He was a player. He’d always been like that, but I thought he changed when he got with you. You can’t blame yourself for him. And well, as for the baby, this baby is going to be so loved and taken care of. He or she will never doubt how much they are loved. You’re going to be a great mom.”