Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 96978 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 485(@200wpm)___ 388(@250wpm)___ 323(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96978 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 485(@200wpm)___ 388(@250wpm)___ 323(@300wpm)
“Rachel, I don’t want to deal with the press right now, and as far as Johnny is concerned…” I bite my lip because after Ammo, I barely even remember Johnny’s face, much less the average-at-best sex I had with the cheater. It also makes me inwardly smile thinking about how that’s Roxy’s fucking problem now.
“Excuse me, Ms. Falcon.” The younger of the two of my new security team stands in the doorway holding the box of pizza, and my heart feels like a knife has been inserted in it.
“Oh, um, just set it here.” I motion on the table as I move the wine and fight the need to burst into tears. What is wrong with me? So, he just ordered pizza, then left? Or did he leave and then order pizza as a consolation prize?
“Thanks.” I clear my voice and wait for the security guard to leave since he was just standing as if he was expecting a tip or something.
“Oh dear.” Rachel shakes her head, and that’s it. I’m done with her and everyone for the day.
“What?” I snap. “I don’t want to talk about him…he’s a non-issue, you got it?” I stand, and she purses her lips that I sometimes wish I had the courage to tell her are just getting way too big.
“Fine. Back to business, then. The Grammys want you to perform, and the Broken Vixens are nominated for three songs. Now here me out.” She holds up her hands, “You show up, look fabulous. I’ll go with you, of course…then you perform solo, maybe even a new song. You’ll steal the show.”
“I can’t handle this right now.” I shake my head because I just want her to leave me alone.
“You have to. This is what I’m talking about, Courtney. These are opportunities that you don’t pass up. The Grammys don’t want the Broken Vixens to perform…they want you. Take it.” She slaps the table as my eyes dart to hers. My mind instantly returns to Ammo hissing “Take it” as he slammed his giant cock in and out of me.
“Fine.” I flip open the top of the pizza box and just stare at it. It has jalapeños on it…he didn’t even ask me if I like them. He just ordered what he wanted. Because of course, he did. I close it and look over at her.
“See if Melanie will be back, and you’re right, we do need to give everyone a taste.” I grab the bottle of wine and my glass.
“You’ll take care of everything?” Because the last thing I want to think about is a dress and jewels… No, I want to go upstairs, with my bottle, and stalk the Internet about Ammo, and torture myself looking at the numerous women he’s been with, so that come tomorrow morning, I won’t feel anything.
“Don’t you worry, Mommy has it all under control.” She smiles and tilts her head at me. “You know, you do look tired, why don’t you go upstairs and get some rest. I’ll pick you up tomorrow and drive you to the studio.” She stands, reaching for her purse.
“You don’t have to.” My eyes narrow on the pizza box.
“It’s no problem, my love.” She pats my cheek and reaches for the box.
“No, leave it. He ordered it, he’s gonna eat it.” My voice is calm as I turn and start toward my stairs…verses instantly start spinning around in my head.
I’m such a fool. I thought you were different.
I can’t win, I’m my worst critic.
Matters of the heart.
They tear you apart.
Shatters your heart.
Shards of dark.
I grab my phone and type out the words, then press send as three little dots instantly appear.
AMMO:
Shatter your mind, tear open your heart.
Break free of your fear. Don’t be scared of the dark.
Matters of the heart…
They tear you apart.
Shatters your heart.
Shards of dark.
It’s all in your head. None of this real.
But if you fall, you need to call out.
I’ll hold your hand.
Be there in the dark.
“Fuck…” I whisper as I feel goosebumps trickle my arms as I sink down on my bed. He’s not supposed to fire off verses in seconds. I knew he was a musical genius, but not with lyrics, only the notes. This can’t happen.
He can’t happen.
But he has, he’s everywhere, his smell, his touch. When I close my eyes I see his face. My fingers reach up and touch my lips that still tingle from his mouth.
You need to be careful, he has the power to hurt you.
My hand drops and I look down at my phone.
“Don’t trust anyone,” I whisper, blocking out any excitement. Ignoring my heart and its desperate need to feel this.
It’s just work.
And what happened in the bathroom was just two people caught in days of frustration and anger, who took it out on each other. It really could have been anyone in that bathroom, and I’m sure I’d have responded the same.