Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 101264 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101264 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 506(@200wpm)___ 405(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
I don’t really relish the idea of wandering this house without him at my side, either. “It’s the only way. She won’t talk to me frankly if you’re there.” She might not even do it if we’re alone, but…I have to try. And not only to fulfill my side of the bargain with Zeus. What happened with Pan yesterday more than proved that Hermes’s warning has merit. Even if we don’t fully understand why Pan was attacked, we don’t know who did it or if they intend to strike again. That means Apollo is potentially in danger as well.
I have to keep reminding myself that he was moving through Olympus’s shark-infested waters years before I ever came into his life, and no one stuck a literal knife in his ribs during that time. That they’re unlikely to do it now, even if Minos is an unknown factor. Apollo doesn’t actually need me to watch his back. The only real value I have is that I’ve spent so much time on the sidelines, studying the powerful in order to escape their wrath, that I have insight into people’s motivations that he doesn’t. If it comes down to a fight of any sort, I’m worse than useless.
Apollo does not need me.
The thought should reassure me, but it feels strangely like a lie. “Please be careful,” I blurt out.
His dark brows draw together. “I won’t be reckless, but I don’t know that I can promise to be careful. If an opportunity comes to get the information we need, then I have to take it.”
I know that. Of course I know that. But the panic bleating inside me won’t listen. “Is Olympus really worth your life?”
He smooths my hair back. Anyone else would attempt to soothe me with meaningless reassurances. Not Apollo. He’s oh so serious as he holds my gaze. “You don’t think highly of the Thirteen, and with good reason. But the fact remains that we work for Olympus’s benefit.” He clears his throat at my look of disbelief. “Some of us work for Olympus’s benefit. You might not like the method, but the people of this city are protected, both upper city and lower. No one goes hungry. Our crime rates are lower than any city of comparable size.”
“Those things might be true, but it’s not the full picture.” I shake my head. “We both know that crimes committed by the powerful get swept under the rug.”
He opens his mouth, seems to reconsider, and finally nods. “Fair point. It’s not a perfect system, and I’d be lying if I said it was.” He sighs. “I didn’t take the title of Apollo to make a grab for power. That may have been what my family wanted, but I knew there might be sacrifices involved with being a member of the Thirteen. I will do whatever is required to keep this city and all the people in it safe.”
The answer is so perfectly Apollo. Of all the people who currently hold titles for selfish reasons, he would be the one who saw the title as a custodianship instead of a throne elevating him over the heads of all those lesser.
I love you.
I clamp my lips together to keep the words from springing free. It’s getting harder and harder not to tell him how I feel, no matter how selfish and unfair it would be to confess. There’s nothing else to do but get ready and carry on with the mission. As tempting as it is to try to seduce him into staying in bed with me and pretending the rest of the party doesn’t exist…it’s impossible.
Everything about this situation is impossible.
“I’ll take a shower, then.”
He stops me with his hand on my shoulder. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”
I force a smile. “And what about you?” The risk to Minos’s other party guests might be nonexistent if my theory is correct, but the same can’t be said for Apollo. He’s a threat and Minos knows it.
Apollo shrugs. “Like I said, risk goes with the territory.”
We could go round and round like this for hours, but nothing will change. I’m leaving. He’s staying, noble white knight that he is. It’s why I love him, even if right now I wish he’d be selfish for once, look to his own interests instead of Olympus’s.
But even if I was staying, this would never work in the long term. He’s at home swimming in waters deep enough to drown me.
I head for the bathroom and take my time getting ready. Normally, my morning rituals and beauty regimen make me feel better and more centered by the end of the process. It’s the kind of mindless repetition that usually allows my brain to work out problems the same way that driving is supposed to.
Instead, I seem to blink and I’m ready. There’s no peace to be found. I glance at the bathroom door, worry gnawing in my stomach. When I agreed to come here, I honestly thought the only thing in danger would be my heart. I didn’t expect actual assault.