Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 111775 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 559(@200wpm)___ 447(@250wpm)___ 373(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 111775 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 559(@200wpm)___ 447(@250wpm)___ 373(@300wpm)
I was barely succeeding at keeping myself alive, never mind four children.
“Delia, I’ve always known how much money you got for caring for the kids. If I wanted custody, I would’ve pushed for it years ago.”
She blinked, some of her hostility fading. I wanted to add she and Ken could do with spending some of that money on the kids and getting them some new clothes, maybe a trip away during the school holidays, but I wasn’t about to push my luck.
“We know they’d prefer to be with you,” Delia said then. “But you weren’t old enough to take them when they first entered the system, and now, well, it’s been years, and you still haven’t built up a strong enough base to house them.” She sniffed. “I suppose we don’t have anything to worry about.”
Her words stung, and I suspected she knew it.
I set aside my pride when I responded, “You’ve spent the better part of the last decade raising them. I wouldn’t dream of taking them away from you, nor putting the kids through such an upheaval,” I said, and it was true. Ken and Delia might’ve been stingy and vaguely neglectful, but they weren’t outright abusive. My step siblings could sleep soundly in their beds at night knowing no one was going to hurt them, and that was a big positive as far as I was concerned.
She stepped back. “I suppose you can come in and see them. Just for a little while.”
“Thank you,” I replied, picking up the bag she’d placed on the floor and carrying it inside. I was still smarting a little from her comment about me not having worked my way up to providing a home for the kids, even after all those years. It wasn’t like I hadn’t tried. I just didn’t make enough money to save much. Whatever extra I had at the end of the month I normally spent on the kids anyway.
I went into the living room and found Vivi sitting by the window doing Shelly’s hair in a plait while Robbie was on the couch playing a game on the second-hand Xbox I’d gotten for him last Christmas.
“Maggie,” Vivi exclaimed with a wide smile when she saw me. “I didn’t know you were coming over.”
“I brought some things,” I said, holding up the bag. Immediately, Robbie dropped the game controller and came to rifle through it. He found the football jersey I’d managed to snag in his size, and he grinned.
“This is great, Maggie. Liverpool’s my favourite team.”
“I know,” I replied. “Glad you like it.”
There was a cute pair of jeans for Vivi and a dress for Shelly, as well as a puzzle game I thought they’d all like. The door creaked open, and Eamonn popped his head in, his eyes red from crying.
“Hey, Eamonn. Delia said you stubbed your toe.”
He nodded quietly and came to sit beside me. I wrapped my arms around his small frame and gave him a hug. Now nine, Eamonn had only been a baby when the kids came to live with Ken and Delia. He was the youngest and the one I worried about most because he’d always been very quiet and sensitive. He reminded me a lot of myself, actually.
“I got you something,” I said, pulling the cosy wool jumper from the bag and placing it in his lap. “It’s for the winter,” I went on. “So, you won’t be cold.”
Eamonn nodded, his small fists gripping the jumper as he stared at the blue material.
“Thanks, Maggie,” he said quietly.
I kept my arm around him, and we sat for a while watching Robbie resume his computer game. Vivi told me what a great time she had at Glendalough, and Shelly talked about the new girl in her class who she’d befriended. Eamonn remained glued to my side the whole time, and when I had to leave, I sensed he didn’t want me to go.
That wasn’t unusual. Eamonn had always been very clingy with me, and I wondered if it was because I looked so much like her—like our mother. But that couldn’t be right. As I’d said, he was only a baby when she went away.
By the time I got home that evening, I felt drained from both the interaction with Shay and Delia’s accusation I wanted to take the kids from her. I made myself some soup for dinner, not feeling very hungry.
I slept in the next day and tried not to look at my clock. I spent my time tidying my flat and listening to the end of my audiobook. The following morning, I was full of nerves because I knew I was going to see Shay, and I wasn’t sure how to act. I could’ve continued getting an earlier bus, but it had been a nuisance doing that over the last week. It put my schedule off, and I was too exhausted to keep trying to avoid him. I just needed to get back to normal, even if it meant seeing him and feeling the discomfort of what he now knew about me.