Total pages in book: 40
Estimated words: 40662 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 203(@200wpm)___ 163(@250wpm)___ 136(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 40662 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 203(@200wpm)___ 163(@250wpm)___ 136(@300wpm)
“Bill Clinton is a rich and powerful politician still. He makes shitloads running around the world, giving speeches. But Monica Lewinsky is just remembered for all those sordid details. Her life was ruined.”
Linda looks away. “That’s not what I want.”
“I know it isn’t,” I say softly. “I honestly believe you have Maggie’s best interests at heart. I’ve looked into you, and you’ve done some really good work.”
She looks back up at me. “I’ve heard this sort of thing before, you know. From men just like you.”
“Really?” I’m genuinely surprised. “They’ve told you that they’re in love?”
She hesitates. “No. Not that. Not exactly that.”
“I am in love,” I say again. The words feel so good on my tongue that I laugh a little bit. “I really do love her, Linda. It’s stupid and insane, but I do.”
She’s silent for a moment. “How does she feel?”
“I don’t know,” I admit. “I think she feels the same, but we haven’t talked about it. We haven’t really been able to.” I clench my jaw for a second, looking away. “I thought… I thought I could forget about her. I thought I could move on.”
“But here you are,” she says.
“Here I am. I’m exhausted, stupid, and in love. And I’m at your mercy now.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“I know.” I lean forward on my desk, rubbing at my eyes. “It’s a messed up situation. You don’t know me, you don’t know what my intentions are. But I hope this… I hope you’re willing to see this for what it is.”
“And what is that?”
“I’m trying to win the woman I love. I want to be with her, Linda. For real.”
She just shakes her head again. “I’m sorry. I can’t really believe this.”
“If you run that story, it’ll never happen. I’ll not only lose whatever political capital I have, effectively ending my presidency, but I’ll lose the woman I love. I’d rather lose my job than Maggie.”
She stares at me. “Do you really mean that?”
“Yes,” I say softly.
“Then go public.”
I sit there, watching her for a second. “Are you serious?”
“I’m serious.” She leans forward suddenly, eyes fierce. “If you love that girl, tell the world. Admit to it, be honest. Don’t hide behind your power like so many other men before you have.”
“What about my privacy?”
“You don’t get privacy anymore.” She sighs, shakes her head. “If you want me to believe this, go public. Prove it to me. Prove you love her.”
I slowly sink back into my chair.
It’s an impossible choice. I know what she’s asking me to do, but worse, I think she knows it, too.
If I go public, I’ll lose it all. I’ll be a laughingstock. Even if people believe me, and they really might not, I’ll still be that pervy old President that fell in love with a younger woman. They’ll think I’m pathetic.
They won’t understand. Healthcare reform will be dead and gone.
“Okay,” I say. “But I have to ask her first.”
She smiles slightly. “Good. That’s what I was hoping you’d say.”
She pushes her chair back and slowly stands up. I watch as she turns away and hesitates.
“Go public, Mr. President. Tell the world how you feel. Because if you don’t…” She trails off and shrugs. “Good luck, sir.”
“Thank you, Linda.”
She leaves my office and I sit there, completely wrecked, completely stunned.
But there’s a sliver of hope.
Maybe my presidency will be a failure. Maybe I won’t get to achieve any of the things I set out to achieve. I’ll have to settle for lesser measures, half steps on the road to a better country.
But if I do this, at least I might not lose Maggie. Otherwise, if I just let this story run, it’ll doom her and I’ll never let myself get over it.
I know what I have to do. The answer is obvious, even if it means giving up something incredibly important.
I may never get another chance at this. I may never get it back.
But it doesn’t matter. I’ve made my decision, and I have to follow through.
19
Maggie
I keep waiting for the world to come crashing down around me.
That article is going to come out sooner or later. Linda Torres is going to ruin Adam’s presidency, and it’s going to be all my fault.
I hate myself for it. I hate that Adam isn’t speaking to me.
I’m so angry, I can barely speak. I can barely do my job.
It’s like I’m in a fog. I come into the office and drift through the day, barely able to focus on anything. Iris tries to talk to me at first, but I barely even acknowledge her.
I don’t want to get up for lunch. I don’t want to talk on the phone. I just want to sit at my desk and sulk.
“Maggie?”
I glance over my shoulder. Roger’s standing there, looking concerned.
He’s probably about to fire me.
“What?”
He winces. “Maggie, someone’s here to see you.”