Total pages in book: 46
Estimated words: 40403 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 202(@200wpm)___ 162(@250wpm)___ 135(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 40403 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 202(@200wpm)___ 162(@250wpm)___ 135(@300wpm)
“Okay. The truth is none of what I have to say is easy persay, but I guess this is the one you need to know anyway.” Her use of the word ‘need’ piques my interest and I lean forward. “I’m pregnant.” I have no idea how long I sit here blinking at her, dumbfounded not necessarily by her revelation but how viscerally the word pregnant hit me in the chest. I try to swallow, wet my now bone-dry throat, but it still feels like something is caught right in the windpipe. “You’re probably wondering how I could be so stupid.” She whispers it and a tear falls down her cheek. I feel like such an idiot for making her feel worse that I force myself to break out of whatever just happened to me.
“No, I'm sorry. I am not judging you. I was just shocked and wondering if you are sure?” She tries to smile and nod.
“Yeah. I found out a month and a half ago.”
“Really? How far along are you?”
“Four and a half months?” She has got to be kidding me. She should be showing, right? I mean at least a little bit. She is the smallest girl on this team which is why she is the one that is usually being tossed in the air..
“How is that possible? I mean you..” She stands in the middle of my words and lifts her shirt. I watch her turn to the side and relax and there before my eyes is a pooch. It’s not big by any means but it is obvious and I know it wasn’t there months before. “Holy..I mean..Wow. How have you hid that?” I put my hand over my mouth because I realize how it sounds and to my surprise she giggles.
“I know right? I think at first I was in such denial. I knew for months, I think before having it confirmed by a doctor but I was able to pretend and force myself to come up with another explanation for the missed periods, and the emotional moments and because I have so much other stuff happening, that I just kept overlooking it. I figured my body followed suit.” Her words are affecting me and I can feel the goosebumps littering my skin.
“So what changed? I mean what made you pay attention?” She averts her eyes from mine and I know whatever she is going to say won’t be the full picture but close enough.
“I could only call the vomiting ‘flu-like symptoms’ for so long before I had to find out the truth.” Oh God. I place my hand over my heart as the pace begins to pick up. I feel the hair on the back of my neck move, a breeze of recognition skims the skin. “Finally, I went to the doctor and she made me take a pregnancy test. It took less than two minutes for it to come back positive. By then I was three months along.” She says the last part low, her hand on her belly.
“I-I um..what about the father?” At the mention of the other half of this unborn baby, she looks at me and begins picking up her things. “Mari, wait. Did I say something?” I grab her arm to keep her from running when I finally have her talking. She yanks it from my grasp and turns to me.
“I haven’t told him and I don't plan on it. I need to get away. Find somewhere to go where he can’t find me.” Fear covers her entire face, so much so that I have to look over my own shoulder for danger.
“Does he hurt you, Mari? Is that what the bruises are from?” She nods through a cascade of tears. “Mari, why? Why haven’t you told anyone?”
“I grew up seeing it, listening to the cries and pleas and hearing the shattering glass and the impact of fists and flesh. It seemed normal, until the day I found out I was pregnant. I realized on that day two things; I can’t keep this baby and I will not stay in this cycle. So, I contacted an adoption agency and I have been saving money to disappear. Not just from him but from my home life too.” Holy shit.
“Do you need somewhere safe to stay, Mari? I can help you find a place. I mean you can come home with me if you want?”
“No, I will figure it out.”
“Okay listen, I don’t want to push you. Why don’t we do this? This weekend my boyfriend and I are going to a winter feast, sort of a thing put together by one of his friend’s mother who is a chef. How about you come with us? Hang out, have some fun and we talk some more about this. Okay?”
“Well I don’t know..” she takes a few more seconds before nodding her head. “Alright. I will give you my address.” We exchange numbers and I tell her we will pick her up tomorrow. Walking away from her I feel good that I finally reached out to her and figured out what is going on.