Total pages in book: 143
Estimated words: 138844 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 694(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 463(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138844 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 694(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 463(@300wpm)
“But there’s a chance?” Noa pressed.
“It’s…” I sighed and switched lanes again. “Okay. It might be time to let you in on a little secret—and it’s very poorly kept—”
“Like you smoking sometimes?”
Jesus!
I sent him a look, and I couldn’t conceal my shock.
Noa snickered. “Please. Cameron also knows. But he told me it’s one of those things he’ll let you do because, in the grand scheme of things, we have bigger fish to fry.”
Well. Fuck me if my ears didn’t feel a bit hot. I’d thought… I mean, I’d been so careful! I’d showered, I’d washed up, I’d overdosed on chewing gum and mouthwash, and I’d changed clothes. Most of the time. Sometimes.
I tried.
“Moving on,” I managed to say, and I gripped the wheel a little tighter. “Spinal cord research is my poorly kept secret. KC knows I’m keeping an eye on things—he knows I have books and read medical journals on the topic—and he’s acknowledged it a single time. A few months into his initial physical rehab phase, he asked me to never show him those books because he knew the odds. Every now and then, we hear of miracle stories where someone suddenly walks again, or they register new muscle growth where there shouldn’t be.”
“I’ve read about that too!” The boy still held out hope.
To be honest, so did I, but I knew why KC couldn’t.
I wasn’t hoping for a miracle, however. Just scientific improvements in the field.
“You have a better chance at winning the lottery twice,” I said pointedly. Because it was important. “Now, it can be our secret if you want. Just don’t talk about it to Daddy.”
“I get it, but I read about this guy in Poland, and—”
“I read about it him as well.” I cut him off gently but firmly. “I’m not saying never, pet. Quite the opposite—I believe the science is slowly starting to catch up, so maybe, in the future…? But even so, it’s a field in which we know way too little. Everything is experimental because we can’t put together focus groups like you can with, hell, I don’t know, diabetes, Alzheimer’s, et cetera.”
Noa nodded along. “Because spinal cord injuries are so individual. I get that.”
I wasn’t surprised one bit to know he’d started his own research. He wanted KC to have everything most of us took for granted.
“Exactly,” I replied. “So you asked about his chances… Nobody knows, but they’re not good. However, because he injured his spinal cord—it wasn’t severed—there is reason to hope, at least for a family member. Because we don’t know what it’s like to wake up every morning and remember we can’t even go down the stairs. It’s important to KC to manage his hope as well as his expectations. Otherwise…that was how he barely got out of his depression after the accident.”
Noa let out a breath and glanced out the window.
I decided against telling him that KC’s doctors actually had registered a tiny bit of muscle growth in his left leg. It wasn’t as if it’d happened yesterday. It’d been almost two years, and the doctors had delivered their scripted, “We’re afraid we can’t explain exactly why these things happen” speech.
Either way, KC had been stuck on an emotional roller coaster after that appointment. More training, no more results, anger, grief… It took a toll on him.
Nothing had happened since then.
A headache settled in, as if I needed a reminder of how brutal that time in our lives had been. I’d read so many books. I’d scoured the internet for the next reason to hope. Such as the woman in Illinois who’d suddenly walked after fifteen years in a wheelchair. Or the man in Taiwan who’d felt tingles up and down his leg after almost three decades of no sensation at all.
“To circle back, though,” I said. “There’s happiness, and there’s happiness. KC has struggles we don’t have, but don’t think for a second he’s not profoundly happy. He can finally be himself, and he has us. He has you, the love of his life, and a job he’s worked hard for, good friends, our community, and an endless supply of diapers for Cam.”
Noa spluttered a giggle, and that was all I needed to hear right now.
He reached across the center console and hugged my arm, and I kissed the top of his head.
“I love you, Uncle Lucian. I know we talk about the loves of our lives, and…you know. Yeah. KC’s that person for me, like Cameron is for you, but I’m stupid in love with you too, and I can’t live without either of you.”
This boy. I had no words.
I snuck my arm out from between us and hugged him to me. “I feel the exact same way, little love. It’s the four of us forever.”
He nodded. “I’m still holding out hope for vampirism and immortality, though. Otherwise, forever is just a word.”