Total pages in book: 117
Estimated words: 110694 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 553(@200wpm)___ 443(@250wpm)___ 369(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 110694 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 553(@200wpm)___ 443(@250wpm)___ 369(@300wpm)
While we sat down by the water and ate from the container, Stevie talked about the things we had done today, asked when her dad would be back, if she could play outside on her swing set when we got home, if Jayda would roll Maui his ball so he wouldn’t get lonely, and what my favorite color was. Her little brain never seemed to take a break.
When she jumped up with a slice of bread she had taken from the loaf, I glanced back at Locke. He stood maybe a yard away, leaning against a tree. I felt bad that he’d had to spend his day at the Children’s Museum, following us around while Stevie ran from one thing to the next.
“I’d offer you some, but since we ate out of the container, I doubt you want to share our germs. I should have asked if you wanted any. I’m sorry.”
“I’m good,” he said. “But thanks.”
I turned back to watch Stevie as she tore off pieces and giggled happily as the ducks hurried to eat it. Some of the fish would pop up and snatch a bite as well from time to time. After twenty or so minutes, she tired of it and decided it was time for her to go home.
She’d started calling Linc’s house “home” the past few days, and it had been odd for me at first. It definitely did not feel like home for me, but I guessed it would always be her other home, so it was good she felt that way. Even if a part of me was jealous of having to share her. Knowing there would be a home for her that I wasn’t at stung, even when I knew it shouldn’t. I had time to work on that. Myself. How sharing her would affect me.
Her eyes closed on the short drive back to Linc’s, and she slumped over on me as she slept. When we arrived, Locke offered to carry her, and I let him because it was a long walk from the front of the house to her bed. Once she was in bed, I thanked him, and he left.
We repeated basically the same routine the next day, except instead of the Children’s Museum, we went to the zoo.
Stevie spotted a stuffed monkey, whose hands Velcroed around your neck, hanging on several other kids and begged for one. I was having to budget these outings, so I bribed her with a picnic and more duck feeding if we didn’t get the monkey. I could tell she was disappointed, and I felt a twinge of guilt over it, but she couldn’t have everything she wanted. The thought that, one day, she might prefer living with Linc instead of me because he gave her elaborate gifts began to dig in and taunt me. I knew she loved me, and I didn’t have to buy that love, but when she was a teenager…no. Not going there. This was now. I’d cross that bridge when I came to it.
On our way out of the zoo, she needed to make a bathroom stop, and when we walked out, Locke was waiting on us with a damn stuffed monkey in his hands. She saw it immediately.
“You bought a monkey! I wanted one too.” Her voice didn’t even mask her envy.
He held it out to her. “Your dad said to tell you he misses you.”
She squealed and squeezed it to her chest. My throat clogged, my eyes stung, and all those fears came rushing to the forefront. I could not compete with Linc’s gifts.
The rest of the day was easier. While eating, we discussed facts about monkeys that she’d learned at the zoo. I offered to let Locke sit beside us, and this time, I remembered to feed him too. I offered him a sunflower butter and jelly sandwich, and he took it.
On day three, I felt bad for Locke. He had to be tired of this. I almost texted Linc several times to ask if he could give Locke a break and send someone else, but then worried it would sound as if I were unhappy with Locke. There was also the fact that other than that one text, he’d not contacted me again. Not even to ask about Stevie, but I figured he was asking Locke and Jayda instead. Luther hadn’t been around, and either he’d gone with Linc or we had just not crossed paths in the house, which was possible.
The Museum of Natural Science ended up being my favorite out of the three. Stevie loved the preschool discovery room and watching the scuba divers feed the fish in the large aquarium. It was another long four-hour visit, and my funds were getting low. Thinking ahead, I’d asked Jayda if I could pack us lunch in a cooler to take to the park with us instead of me going to get groceries. She had done it for me before I got down to the kitchen today. She’d also mentioned that the pond we had gone to had a playground on the other side.