Total pages in book: 163
Estimated words: 164828 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 824(@200wpm)___ 659(@250wpm)___ 549(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 164828 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 824(@200wpm)___ 659(@250wpm)___ 549(@300wpm)
My heart drops at his cold demeanour.
He rattles through his briefcase and produces a brown paper bag. He pulls out a pregnancy test and holds it out for me.
“Can you take this, please?”
I stare at his haunted face as more hope about us is lost. I just want to howl to the moon. “Sure.” I take it from him and walk into the bathroom.
My heartbeat echoes in my ears.
I lock the bathroom door and open the box. I wipe my eyes with my sleeve so I can try and read the blurred instructions.
How can he be so cold?
I pee on the stick, and before I look at the result, I walk back out into the living room and I pass it to him.
We stare at each other for a moment, and I screw up my face in tears.
“Don’t cry,” he whispers.
“How can I not?” I sob. “Look at how you’re treating me.”
“I’m just… we’re not ready for children, Eliza.”
“You know what?” I cry. “Just fucking go, Nathan. You want to, so don’t let me and a baby hold you back.”
I can’t take this. I need to get away from him. I grab my bag and storm toward the door but Nathan jumps up and grabs me from behind.
“Don’t go,” He says into my hair as he holds me tight.
“What do you want, Nathan?” I whisper. “Is it me or him?”
“It’s you. You know it’s you.”
“Then why are you acting like this?”
“I don’t know,” he whispers as he holds me tightly.
He holds the test up in front of us, and we both read it at the same time.
One line.
One line…
“It’s negative,” he whispers. “But still too early to tell.” He holds me tighter.
I struggle to break free from his grip. “Let me go, Nathan.” I cry.
“I can’t.”
“You’re no good to me if you’re confused,” I whisper angrily.
“Don’t, baby,” he murmurs into my hair.
“Let me fucking go.” I burst out of his arms.
“Don’t you dare walk out that fucking door.”
“Or what?” I cry.
“I mean it,” he warns. His chest rises and falls, as if he’s struggling for control.
We glare at each other. His face is full of fury, and my heart is splintered into a million pieces. “Why are you being like this?” I whisper.
He runs his hands through his hair in frustration. “I’m just fucking stressed out, okay?”
“About what?”
“You have to ask?” he cries, as if outraged.
I stare at him, my mind a clusterfuck of confusion. What the hell is going on here?
What’s happening between us?
This is pointless. I’m not going to get anywhere with him tonight. I don’t want to fight anymore, and I don’t know what to say to make this better.
What is there to say?
“I’m going to bed.” I sigh. I walk up the hall and into the bedroom, and I shut the door behind me.
It’s 2:00 a.m, and I lie in the darkness and listen to Nathan’s regulated breathing.
He kissed me on the cheek to say goodnight before he went to sleep.
It was a token kiss.
It was cold and emotionless. He’s completely shut down on me.
I don’t know what to say or do to make it better.
I want to beg him to talk to me, but then the friend in me steps in, and I want to give him the freedom and space to make a decision for himself.
I roll onto my side and stare into the darkness. Where is my period?
Why isn’t it here?
Five days late. I know that sometimes early tests give a false negative result.
Nathan knows it, too.
I know what’s wrong with Nathan…
He feels trapped.
23
Eliza
I wait in the café for Jolie and Brooke. I’m a bundle of nerves, and to be honest, these are the last two people I want to discuss this with because I already know their thoughts.
April thinks that I need to be open with Nathan and lay it all out on the table, but I feel like I need some advice from people who know us both really well.
The girls come into view, laughing and chatting as they walk through to me before they fall into their seats.
“Hi.” They both smile.
Jolie leans over and kisses my cheek. “I cannot apologize for the other night enough, Lize.”
I roll my eyes. “Well, thanks to you, Nathan has hardly spoken to me all week.”
“What?” They both frown. “Oh no.”
“We had a huge fight, and he’s so hurt.” Jolie puts her head into her hands. “God, I feel terrible.”
“And so you should,” Brooke snaps. “I can’t believe you.”
“Anyway, it gets worse.” I sigh. “Much worse.”
They frown as they listen intently. “Nathan’s ex, Robert, came back, and right in front of me, he professed that he still loves Nathan and wants him back.”
Their faces fall.
“What did Nathan say?”
“He kicked him out.”
“Thank God,” Brooke says as she puts her hand on her chest in relief.
“But he hasn’t spoken to me since.”