Total pages in book: 32
Estimated words: 29210 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 146(@200wpm)___ 117(@250wpm)___ 97(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 29210 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 146(@200wpm)___ 117(@250wpm)___ 97(@300wpm)
My father was a smart man, was good at reading people. So when I saw his dark-gray eyes staring intently into mine, I knew he could sense the lie just from the tone of my voice and probably the posture of my body.
“Jellybean, who do you think you’re talking to? What’s really going on?”
I cleared my throat and shifted on the chair, stretching my legs out on the ottoman in front of me. But I stayed silent.
“Although your mother and I are thrilled you came for a visit, which is far and few between these days, it leads me to believe you’re having a hard time if you’re doing an impromptu visit.”
I felt my face heat, because he was right. I was embarrassed, because I didn’t make more of an effort to come see them. We might not be extremely close, but they were my family, and I loved them very much. So I just went ahead and said it. “I lost my job about a month back.” I stared straight ahead at that mare as she trotted back and forth in the pasture. “And the job I got to replace it is part-time at the local diner, so I’m making shit.” I picked up my glass, my fingers slightly sliding along the condensation.
I didn’t tell my father why I’d gotten fired. I didn’t want to, didn’t want to hash that all out again. But I could still feel him staring at me, probably expecting me to continue on, to tell him more. But I wasn’t ready for that.
“Why didn’t you tell us right away?” There was genuine concern and empathy in his voice. Between my parents, my father was the softie. My mother on the other hand liked to “give it to me straight,” as she put it. She used to say being gentle and beating around the bush never helped you in life.
I guess she was right.
I shrugged, not really sure how to respond. But I ended up finally saying, “Because it was embarrassing as hell, Dad.”
He reached out and placed his hand over mine, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Everything will work out okay.”
I wanted to believe that, but life was cruel in the things it threw your way. I always liked to believe that I could “look on the bright side” of just about anything. I supposed a part of that could be true, but right now with everything I was facing, with the uncertainty of my future, all I could feel was dread, not hope.
If I couldn’t even find a job that could help support just me, how in the hell was I going to take care of a child? How was I going to get through any of this?
I rested my head back on the chair and closed my eyes, letting the breeze wash over me, feeling the strong, steady weight of my father’s hand on mine. I tried to draw strength from it.
Maybe I was looking at this all wrong. Maybe the answer was right in front of me. And that answer was just being honest with Devon, just telling him the truth and letting him help me work through it like he’d done during every other obstacle in my life.
Maybe I needed to stop being a fucking coward and face my fear head-on.
16
Devon
I couldn’t focus, hadn’t been able to since all this went down with Leila. There was so much unfinished stuff we had to talk about, stuff she was avoiding, pushing me away from. And I allowed her to.
I allowed her to put this wedge between us, one that was so deep I didn’t even know if it could be rectified. But it wasn’t all her fault. I allowed her to push me away. I’d try. I’d sure as hell try with my last dying breath.
I ran a hand over the back of my neck, my suit feeling especially tight today, suffocating me. I slid my fingers to my collar, pulling at the material before taking hold of the knot of my tie and slightly loosening it.
The boardroom was still a flurry of conversation, but I wasn’t paying any attention to any of it. I couldn’t focus on anything or anyone but Leila. That wasn’t anything new, but right now, it was even more consuming.
I knew I wasn’t going to let this go. We had to deal with his head-on, even if it was uncomfortable, even if it put us in a bad place. I’d rather deal with the fallout then try to handle the unknown.
“Mr. Lane?”
I blinked a few times and glanced over at Margaret, one of the assistants in the boardroom. Her duties were basically to make sure there was enough food and drinks to go around.
This board meeting had been going on for several hours, with everyone trying to lock down key details on a merger that was in the works. And everyone decided not to leave until things were settled and permanent without any flaws that could backfire.