Total pages in book: 30
Estimated words: 28781 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 144(@200wpm)___ 115(@250wpm)___ 96(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 28781 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 144(@200wpm)___ 115(@250wpm)___ 96(@300wpm)
It was a large green gecko with a sombrero on.
I tilted my head. “That seem weird to you?”
Ace sighed like the question was exhausting. “Trust me when I say you don’t want to ask about the gecko. He puts the gecko in every single hotel room, and every single apartment, he says it adds a personal touch since his gecko, Little G, is part of the brand now.”
“Pause.” I held up my hand. “Is that why they did that huge rebranding last year? To make the Gecko a part of it?”
Ace’s smile dropped. “It was the longest month of my life, well, one of them.”
I wondered if that was a dig at me.
I ignored the pain in my chest and quickly got into bed and faced the wall. Ace did the same, he was slower though, more methodical as he pulled the covers over both of us and laid his head on the pillow. Feeling the bed dip, the painfully satisfying weight of his body on the mattress had me wanting to scoot back until I was pressed up against him.
I’d lost all the reasons why I hated him—knowing that in the end, it wasn’t him I hated, it was myself. It was just easier to deal with if I directed it at the innocent party.
Looking at yourself in the mirror, knowing you were never the victim, but the guilty party wasn’t fun.
It really wasn’t.
I’d wanted to reach out so many times, but I didn’t have a way to, I’d searched social media but he’d gone dark.
Had that been my fault?
“Hey.” I turned and faced his back, tapping my finger on his shoulder. He flipped over to face me. “Why don’t you have Instagram?”
His grin was sleepy, beautiful. “Ah, so she did stalk me.”
“A tiny bit, it’s not like I hired a firm, you nerd.”
“Nerd? Wow, coming out swinging with those insults. Careful, I might go cry in the bathroom.”
I made a fist and tried to punch him in the shoulder when he grabbed it with his massive hand and tugged me against him.
We were chest to chest.
I wasn’t planning on such close proximity. Barely breathing, I finally got out, “W-what are you doing?”
“I hate social media,” he confessed. “And I started getting obsessive.”
“Over reels and TikTok?” I joked, trying to lighten the tension between us.
He shook his head and dropped my hand. “No, over trying to find you.”
Tears filled my eyes. “I archived everything.”
“So did I.”
“It was hard,” I whispered.
He licked his lips and stared at my mouth, then back up into my eyes. “Why was there blood?”
Blood. I forgot I told him about bleeding out.
I’d wanted to tell him so many times, was this my chance? The day of a crazy competition, a concussion, and reuniting under an insane boss and weird office culture I never knew existed?
I took a deep breath. “That’s actually a lot to just… say.”
“Try.”
“But—“
“—you owe me.”
“Low blow.”
He shrugged. “I’m kind of done playing fair with you, Bri.”
Rip the Band-Aid off, just rip it. Shuddering, I tried to pull away from him, but he braced me with his arm and pulled me back into his arms. A tear escaped and rolled down my cheek. “I um, miscarried. We were pregnant with twins.”
He dropped his arm, his skin turned a pale color that even the moonlight couldn’t match. “Twins? Pregnant?”
“Don’t, just let me tell you before I lose the nerve, you can hate me when I’m done, okay?”
“I won’t—“
“—Please?”
His silent nod was like waving a starting flag in front of a race car and dropping it.
I didn’t even know where to begin, so I started at the beginning with our conversation about having kids, and that I found out right after only to miscarry weeks later when I was going to tell him. I confessed all of it, down to the fact that he’d said it was good we weren’t pregnant since we were so young.
“…And then.” I finished. “I saw you with your assistant, I got insecure. I felt like I’d failed you in so many ways, and part of that was how we met, you know? I was already so weak, and you were so strong, always there, and I was just… baggage to myself, to others, and I just couldn’t do it anymore. It hurt to see you smile, and I didn’t want to take that away, so I took the coward walk out of your life.” I forced myself to look at him, his eyes had tears pooling I them. “I went to therapy though, finally. It helped, and I learned a lot about myself, but by then, I’d deleted your number, I couldn’t find you on social media and I just… realized I’d lost the most important thing to me, and I stupidly lost him on purpose.” I cleared my throat in a vain attempt to get rid of the lump there, but it was no use. “It’s okay to hate me. I’m still working on it too, so if I seem abrasive, it’s because it’s so much easier to lash out at the ones closest to you. It’s no excuse, but… I’m sorry.”