Total pages in book: 115
Estimated words: 106948 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 535(@200wpm)___ 428(@250wpm)___ 356(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 106948 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 535(@200wpm)___ 428(@250wpm)___ 356(@300wpm)
“How many times have you shown up at one of Kayla’s classes to take notes for her because she was too hungover to get out of bed?”
“I was already on campus, all I did was sit in her class and record it on my laptop for her.”
And take notes, and forge her signature in the giant lecture hall, but I wasn’t going to tell Leo that.
When I tried to push away from him, he snarled, “How many times has she ditched you to leave with some random guy at a club? When I took you home with me, Hannah, Kayla didn’t give one fucking shit about if you were safe or not. She was too busy doing coke in the bathroom to care, then too busy fucking some guy in his car in the parking lot and doing more coke before going home with him. Your friend is a drug addict who is going to eventually hit rock bottom, and she’s going to try to drag you down with her so your body can cushion the fall.”
“No she wouldn’t, and she doesn’t do hard drugs.”
“Really, Hannah?” He scoffed at me, making me feel like a fool even as I grew more irrationally angry. “You don’t think that spoiled bitch wants to waste her life away being either drunk or high and avoiding all her responsibilities? Pull your head out of your ass, Hannah, before she sucks the life out of you.”
I shoved myself out of his lap so violently that I almost got away, but he gripped me tight and I had no choice but to stay in his embrace. “Let me go!”
“So you can run and hide from the truth? No.”
“Fuck you,” I shouted. “Let me the fuck go, now, Leo! I’m not kidding. Let. Me. Go!”
He abruptly released me and I stumbled away from him, my chest heaving as I pointed my finger at him. “You have no idea who I am, who Kayla is, and what we’ve been through. You have no right to judge me or her when you don’t know either of us. So she has some problems, we all do, that doesn’t mean I should just abandon her like her parents did.”
Tension filled the air between us as Leo stood then stalked across the room to me, close enough that his wide chest bumped my accusing finger. “Why are you defending someone who is such a shitty friend to you? Someone who uses you, someone who treats you like a doormat, and you let her.”
“She loves me!”
“She loves herself more. Are you really so desperate for acceptance that you can’t see that?”
Pissed, so pissed I was seeing red, I swung out to hit him, but he gripped my wrist before I could make contact.
“Fuck you!”
Quicker than I could blink, he had me wrapped up in some kind of crazy submission hold and taken down to the ground, his weight pinning me as I writhed and raged, calling him all kinds of names. Adrenaline pounded through me, turning me into a spitting-mad mess as I took out my rage on Leo, venom spewing from deep inside my soul.
I’d never, ever lost my cool like this but it felt good to let loose some of the pressure I’d pushed down deep inside of me. I liked to pretend that I’m normal, that I’m just like everyone else, but I’m not. My emotional shields are as fragile as glass, and it doesn’t take much to shatter them, which is why I avoided confrontation. My mother had freaked out like this, became inconsolable as she gave her wrath free reign, and the thought of being like her terrified me.
“Don’t let me,” I sobbed to Leo.
With his weight still pinning me to the floor in complete submission, he shifted the slightest bit so I could breathe easier. “Don’t let you what?”
“Don’t let me become my mother. I don’t want to hurt people like she does.”
“You’re worried about that? Hannah, you are nothing like your mother.”
“You don’t know her.” My throat tried to close up and I shivered. “Her words can cut you like a scalpel, peel your skin from your muscles and flay you alive.”
A low growl rumbled through his chest. “Anyone that would do that to their own child doesn’t deserve to live.”
“It’s not her fault—”
“If you say it’s not her fault because your sister died of cancer, I’m going to have to strangle you,” Leo cut in as his hands tightened on my bruised wrists, sending jagged shards of pleasure-pain spinning through me. “Your mother was an adult who decided she didn’t give a fuck anymore about anyone or anything but herself. That was her choice, not something that was thrust upon her. People die every day and their loved ones manage to go on, manage to honor their memories without eviscerating an obviously sensitive kid on a daily basis.”