Total pages in book: 66
Estimated words: 76696 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 383(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 76696 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 383(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
Zach
Amber disappeared in the bathroom to splash her face with water. The moment the door closed behind her, her dad turned toward me. “Let’s go into the living room and talk.”
Brian, the traitor, didn’t join us. He went up to his room. I was surprised he didn’t want to be present when his dad roasted me. I sank down on the brown sofa and Amber’s dad took a seat in an armchair across from me. “Call me Joseph,” he said, then he eyed me closely. “You’ve been dating Amber for a while now.”
“Six weeks,” I said. I decided not to mention that I’d never been in a serious relationship before. Fathers usually didn’t like that.
“Brian told me a lot about you.”
Of course, he had. “Okay,” I said slowly.
“I don’t care about that. Well, I did before I saw you and Amber together, but now…” He trailed off. “Today I saw glimpses of the daughter I lost three years ago. I thought she was gone completely.” I could tell that he was struggling for composure. He clenched his hands at his side and his gaze flitted to a frame at the wall. In it was a photo of his entire family: Amber, Brian, Joseph and his wife. It was the first photo I’d seen of Amber’s mother. She had Amber’s nose and eyes. Amber didn’t have family photos in her room. She didn’t have any photos of herself or her life before the rape anywhere. “But Amber has gone through a lot. First her mother’s death. She and Brian had to see their mother waste away slowly, and then the attack. That leaves scars. I’m not sure what would happen if things between you and her ended badly. A little over two years ago, I came home early from work because of a migraine, and Amber didn’t answer when I called her name. I ran upstairs and found her on the bathroom floor in a pool of her own blood, barely breathing. If I had returned home later, she would have been dead. I don’t ever want to experience that again. Don’t break her heart. I’ve lost my wife, I won’t lose my daughter too.”
I didn’t even know what to say to that. I nodded, feeling as if a heavy weight had been dumped on my chest.
Amber
I froze in front of the living room, shocked. I couldn’t believe Dad had made it sound as if Zach could be responsible for another suicide attempt if he left me. It would hurt horribly if things between Zach and me didn’t work out, but I’d come too far to kill myself over something like that. I wanted to live with or without Zach.
I made sure to let them hear my footsteps as I entered the living room. Dad got up at once, smiling. He still looked at me in wonder. “I need to call your aunt.”
I waited until he was gone before I sat down beside Zach. “You look like you saw a ghost.”
He smiled, but it wasn’t as bright as usually. “Your dad is an intimidating guy,” he joked.
I snorted. “No, he isn’t.” Zach didn’t say anything else about the conversation and I didn’t want to bring it up. I wanted to enjoy Thanksgiving.
My aunt and uncle were as surprised about the changes in me as my dad had been. It was wonderful to sit around a table with everyone without having worried glances thrown my way. In the last few years everyone had always waited for me to have a nervous breakdown, but today Zach was the center of attention. Everyone loved them, especially my little cousins. Zach carried them around on his shoulders and told them about his fights. Even Brian laughed like he hadn’t laughed in years. Life was good.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Amber
It was only one week till Christmas. I’d bought a calendar with gorgeous photos of Patagonia for Zach, but I still needed something else. I was bad at buying gifts for others. Maybe I needed to take Reagan up on her offer to help me with my Christmas shopping this year. One pre-Christmas gift I’d planned for tonight wasn’t exactly a gift, though I had a feeling that Zach would be more excited about it than about the calendar.
Zach and I were snuggled against each other on the sofa, and he was trailing his fingers up and down my arm. It was distracting. The credits played on the TV screen but I was barely paying attention. Zach’s hand moved lower and began drawing gentle circles on my hip. All through the movie, I’d been thinking about my decision. I wanted to be absolutely sure that I was ready before I told Zach. I didn’t want to have to push him away. He’d been so patient with me.
Zach leaned back and stretched, revealing a sliver of his muscled stomach. I loved running my hand over it, over Zach’s entire body. I loved how velvety his penis felt in my palm, how I could make him tremble under my touch. I felt powerful when we were in bed together. Since the incident sex had always equated being powerless and losing control, but with Zach I’d discovered that it didn’t have to be that way. I wanted Zach. I really wanted to be with him, wanted to finally rid myself of that last barrier from the past. Butterflies swarmed in my stomach. My body yearned for Zach’s touch, for the feel of his skin against mine.
Zach noticed me staring and cocked one eyebrow. I wished I could do that. For me it’s either both eyebrows, or none. “Do I have something on my face?”
For a few moments I didn’t say anything then I shook my head. I wrapped my hand around Zach’s, then stood and tugged at his arm. Without hesitation he also got to his feet, confusion clear on his face. “Amber? What’s the matter?”
I bit my lip, embarrassed to voice my request. I curled a hand around his neck, pulled him down to me and kissed him, then I murmured against his mouth. “I want to sleep with you.”