Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 102731 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 514(@200wpm)___ 411(@250wpm)___ 342(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 102731 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 514(@200wpm)___ 411(@250wpm)___ 342(@300wpm)
What a bloody day.
I nodded numbly, because she was right about that. It would be childish to mark Lewis as off-limits to Carianne. We lived in a small village. Our romantic options were few. Lewis Adair was a catch, and if it wasn’t Carianne, it would be someone else.
She bent her head, expression sympathetic. “And if I hear anyone talking shit about you, their ears will be ringing by the time I’m done with them.”
I nodded again.
“It’ll blow over, Callie. You’re the latest gossip because you’ve just come home. But once you’re here a while, they’ll find someone new to talk about. You know what they’re like.”
I did. I’d just never taken the brunt of it before. When there was gossip about me and Mum all those years ago, I imagined she protected me from the worst of it.
Being home seemed to have caused nothing but trouble so far. If I left, maybe the bullies would leave Harry alone.
And if Carianne and Lewis began dating, I wouldn’t want to see that.
How ironic would it be if Lewis ended up staying in Ardnoch, and I ended up leaving?
“I have to run. Promised some girls from the salon I’d bring wine to a potluck.” Carianne grinned and then kissed my cheek. “Thanks for being the best. Love you.”
I don’t know how long I stood there in that shop before I finally got up the strength to grab a bottle of wine, pay for it, and get back in the car.
There were missed calls from my mum, but I couldn’t talk to anyone right now. Instead of going back to my parents’ house for a bubble bath, I drove to the car park where only yesterday I’d told Lewis I didn’t want him, where he’d taken the news like he barely cared. His reaction made little sense since he’d apparently returned to Ardnoch for me.
Kicking off my shoes and dumping them in the car, I grabbed the wine bottle and stomped through the dunes.
The coastal wind hit me, fluttering through my light shirt and whipping my hair back off my face. I barely felt it. This part of the beach, as I hoped, was empty at this time of day, even though it was low tide. The sand was soft and golden, resistant to my footfall until I neared the shore where it was compacted by the water’s continual caress. The cold sand squeezed pleasantly between my toes as I walked along the edge, letting the water kiss my feet before falling back again. Miles of it stretched on ahead, and dark green hills loomed in the distance where the earth jutted out into the sea. Sunbeams cut through the white clouds, and light bounced and glittered across the gentle waves.
I sucked in a breath, trying to pull myself together.
It shouldn’t bother me feeling rejected by my brother, by my village, and in a way, by Carianne who was choosing her attraction to Lewis over me … but it hurt so badly, I wanted to disappear.
After what my real father did to us, Mum asked if I wanted to see a therapist and I’d said no. It didn’t take a therapist to tell me that the kind of traumatic rejection and lack of love I’d experienced at my real father’s hands had scarred me deeply. I handled rejection like it was the end of the fucking world.
Having chosen a twist-cap wine bottle, I moved to take the cap off and guzzle it down. But my hand hovered over it. The last time I got drunk I had sex with Lewis, and it messed with my head.
More than that, I could hear Aunt Ally’s voice in my head. When she was younger and going through something traumatic, she escaped into drugs and alcohol and ended up in rehab.
I didn’t want to turn my weekly ritual of a wee glass of wine and a bubble bath into downing a bottle by the ocean. It changed it from a simple pleasure to a tool to numb my feelings.
Stopping, I hugged the bottle to my chest and stared out at the vastness of the water before me. Sometimes I wondered what it would be like if a body never tired and you could dive into the ocean and swim for eternity, free of troubles, heartache, and responsibilities.
I let its rhythm soothe me, lull me, calm me.
Until I felt ready to return home to face my family.
Sixteen
LEWIS
The best thing that could’ve happened after Callie’s rejection was starting the new job at my dad’s firm. I was already familiar with most of the staff and other architects because I’d worked part time for two summers at the firm before leaving for uni.
If anyone was bothered that my dad was a partner and I’d been hired out of nepotism, I didn’t get that impression. Hopefully, it was because my reputation preceded me. I’d worked on a couple of projects during my degree that had received national recognition.