Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 79232 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79232 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
“We’ll have to see,” he says. “In the past, a warning from the O’Gregors hasn’t been something to heed, has it?”
“I agree. He’s no friend of ours, Keenan,” Lachlan says. “Could’ve just been stirring up trouble among us.”
“Aye,” Keenan says. “No doubt. For now, we make sure that we’re safe and secure. I’ll follow up with Father Finn to ensure he’s heard nothing more about stirrings at the O’Gregors. Nolan?”
I nod. “Where’s Sheena tonight?”
I tell him. He nods. “Seems like the right decision. And your plans after tonight?”
“Don’t know,” I mutter with a sigh. “I’ll deal in the morning.”
Keenan nods, then pushes to his feet. “It’s late, lads. Get some rest. We’ll have another meeting in the morning.” He holds up a finger in warning. “But see to it that no one else hears about this talk of a rat, understood?”
“Aye,” I agree.
“Aye,” Lachlan repeats.
We leave Keenan’s office, and a part of me wants to go to Sheena. Hell, no. All of me wants to go to Sheena. But something’s off, and I know it. I tell myself she’s upset about tonight, she can’t deal with whatever’s happened. That whatever’s made her pull away from me has nothing to do with us.
Now that her mother’s gone… now that they’ve left Stone City… I should feel free.
But I don’t. It feels like a great weight hangs on my chest, and I’m helpless to push it off.
So I go to my room alone.
I tell myself she needs space.
She needs time.
I want to pour myself a few fingers of the best damn Jameson I have and swig it. I haven’t been tempted to drink this badly since I gave it up. It’s a damn good thing I have none nearby. Not sure I’d be able to stop myself tonight.
I stare out the window to the sea, dark and barely visible but for the moonlight that filters from above. I yank open the balcony door. The sea’s tumultuous and vicious tonight, so powerful it could pull a grown man beneath the surface, never to return again. We used to have a lighthouse here but it burnt down a few years ago. I wonder idly if we should build a new one.
Why do I feel as if I’m grieving a loss? As if tonight marks the end to something powerful? I stare at the sea and breathe in the salt air until I shiver with cold. I’ve got a big day ahead tomorrow and need to get to bed.
I hate going to bed alone.
Chapter 20
Sheena
I should feel relief. I should be happy about all that’s happened. We’re free.
Free.
And yet it doesn’t feel that way.
I’m grateful that Maeve and Megan go back to the room with us. I don’t want to be alone with my brothers and sister tonight. The weight of responsibility falls heavily on me with my mother’s passing. I’m not sure how to process my feelings toward her death, and am even less sure how to help them as well.
“What happened tonight?” Maeve asks me, as Megan walks ahead with Fiona. Tiernan joins us and fills her in.
She listens with patience, never interrupting, with no outward show of emotion until he gets to the part of mum’s passing.
Maeve gasps and covers her mouth. “Oh, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Tiernan says. “Honestly, it’s the best thing that could’ve happened.”
“I agree with him,” I say.
Maeve shakes her head sadly. “It’s a sad day when children don’t grieve the loss of their mother. She must not have appreciated all of you the way she should have.”
Tiernan and I look at each other briefly, one moment of grief we share. Not for the loss of a woman who didn’t deserve our love, but for the loss of a life we should have had.
“No,” he says, shaking his head. “She didn’t.”
Megan watches us in silence, her wide eyes taking it all in. She isn’t usually so quiet, and it makes the night feel somber. I wonder what her story is.
“Well,” Maeve says. “We’ll get some rest for tonight, and tomorrow, I’m sure the boys will help us come up with a plan for all of you.”
“Aye,” Megan says. “Those boys are good at that type of thing.” Her twinkling eyes look teasingly at Maeve, who swats at her with affection. Megan laughs and runs ahead, opens the door to the room where they’ve been staying, and ushers us all in.
I get the kids situated finally. Maeve and Megan offer to stay, and at first I tell them I’m fine.
“You’ve been through a lot,” Maeve says gently. The three of us sit in a small dining area, drinking steaming cups of tea while the others sleep soundly. “Let me stay tonight and help if Sam wakes? You need your rest.”
I look at her kind, gentle gray eyes, and to my shock and horror, find my own filling with tears. She notices and reaches her hand to mine.