Total pages in book: 154
Estimated words: 142664 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 713(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 142664 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 713(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
“I won’t tell you how to run your billion-dollar company; you don’t tell me how to take down the enemy.”
“Enemy? That’s a bit much, don’t you think?”
“What did I say?”
“You’re right, carry on.” That’s more like it. This is fun. Usually, I have to keep my thoughts to myself because my brothers or sisters-in-law would try to talk me out of shit. They always seem to think every plan I come up with is leading me straight to prison or hell. That’s no damn fun.
I’ve had a whole night to think about what I was going to do to my dearly beloved. Garrett put in his pitch for mercy, telling me all about the conversation he’d had with them where they explained why they didn’t tell me what was going on because I was a child. I had to remind him again that he was just there to listen and I didn’t need his input.
“I will give my brothers some leeway since they did go out of their way to protect me, but I won’t let them off the hook for treating me like a stranger in my own family, no matter what excuse they have.”
“You know best dear. Just as long as our kids have their uncles at the end of the day, whatever you choose to do is fine.” I waved him off. “I’m not thinking about your damn kids right now. Besides, nine months is a long time; anything can happen between now and then.”
He didn’t have anything to say to that, which was for the better because he was beginning to be a bit of a downer. “Anyway, as I was saying, Mom is a bit of a sticky wicket. She was just plain nuts at that time, with just one oar in the water, and in the South, we don’t mistreat our kin with arterial flows above the neck, and that’s a fact.”
He laughed like I was his comic relief, and I just looked at him until he stopped. He wrapped his hand behind my head and pulled me in for a kiss. “Never change baby.”
“I didn’t plan to.”
“Go on. What else have you done? You’ve been at it for a while.”
“Oh, I uploaded a video of Lacey and Denny in my bed. Not the whole thing, though, because even though revenge porn is legal in our state, that’s tacky.”
“You did what?”
“Well, since I put up the sheets and dropped hints, I lost a whole day. I had to make up for it.”
“Where did you get a video of that? Didn’t they know you had a camera in the bedroom?”
“That’s the thing, I didn’t. I don’t know if he left it there and forgot or she did. Maybe they were making amateur porn for Pornhub. Who knows? Anyway, I found it when I was looking for my luggage.”
I took a big sip of my shake and felt the shivers of delight rush down my spine. “I could really go for some wine now.” I had held off while I was doing my thing because I didn’t want to get the two accounts mixed up while drunk off my ass. I didn’t want anyone to realize that I was the one outing Helen just yet, after all.
As for Lacey and Denny, they’ve been getting all kinds of heat from the looks of it and that did my heart good. His friends were laughing at his little dick. Truthfully, I only posted the video because I didn’t like the fact that most people were still suspecting that Sherry was the one who he’d cheated with. I may have given up on our friendship, but that didn’t mean I wanted her crucified for something she hadn’t done.
“I have to think of a way to get my brothers before we land. I’ve decided I don’t want to spend my honeymoon on this shit, and I’m going to have a lot on my hands working for my new asshole boss once we get back, so who knows when I’ll find time again.”
I looked at him as he pretended to read his book and ignored the fact that I’d just cussed at him. “I caught what you did there. It’s fine, though, because I’m firing you after my first child is born.”
“I’ll just get a job somewhere else.”
“I’ll have you blacklisted from the market.”
“What is this? Let’s see who’s crazier? You sure you wanna start this war?”
“Not at all, but you should know I never start a fight I can’t win.”
“I read Sun Tzu too, you know.”
“Good, so I’ll do you one better. I’m going to tell you how I’m going to win. I’ll keep you barefoot and pregnant for the next ten years. By the time our youngest is in school, you’d have been out of the market for way too long to jump back in. And besides, you won’t want to; I’ll make sure of it.”