Total pages in book: 168
Estimated words: 153571 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 768(@200wpm)___ 614(@250wpm)___ 512(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 153571 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 768(@200wpm)___ 614(@250wpm)___ 512(@300wpm)
I think Dr. Tanner knows not to even bother trying to get me to move. He eyes me for a split second and then shakes his head, a wry smile tilting his lips up. He turns back to Mila without saying a word.
"You're not supposed to be in the bed with me," Mila whispers, still sniffling.
"I don't give a fuck," I mutter, running my hands up and down her arms again. "I'm not moving from this bed until Stella is here, baby. We're doing this together."
"Stella?" she asks.
Before I can answer, another contraction hits.
"Push, sweetheart," I whisper in her ear, holding her little body tightly as she cries out in pain. I keep my lips planted next to her ear as two nurses push her legs back toward her round belly, and she starts pushing again. "You're doing so fucking good, Mila. Do you have any idea how much I love you? You're so strong. You can do this."
"Keep pushing, Mila," Dr. Tanner says. "She's crowning."
Mila bears down, her entire body tensing as she pushes harder.
"Good, good," he says. "Okay, relax for just a minute."
Mila falls limply against my chest, panting. She's not crying as hard this time, though.
"We're naming her after your mom," I whisper in her ear, brushing her hair away from her sweaty forehead. We've gone back and forth over names a thousand times, but nothing felt right until I thought about naming the baby after Mila's mom. "When Stella asks where she got her name, you can tell her all about the incredible woman who watches over the two of you for me when I can't be here to do it myself."
Mila told me a lot about her mom, the kind of woman she was, and how much she loved her. It kills me that she lost her so young. I can't bring her mom back or change the way her father neglected her after her mother died, but I can give her a little piece of her childhood back. Something to remind her that, even if her father is a piece of shit, she had a mother who adored her.
When Mila thinks about her childhood, I want her to remember the good times and the woman who loved her, not the father who never deserved her. I want her to remember that she had someone who loved her as much as I do. I want her to know that her mom will always be a part of her and our daughter's lives, even if she isn't here.
"Roman," Mila breathes.
"She's important to you, baby," I tell her. "And I'm so fucking thankful to her for bringing you into this world. How could we not name the baby after the woman that brought you into my life? She might not be here, but she'll always be a part of your and our daughter's lives this way."
"Jesus, he's sweet," one of the nurses whispers and then blushes like she didn't mean to say it out loud.
I don't really care what she thinks, though. All I care about is Mila.
"He is sweet," Mila says, her voice shaking. She's crying again, but fuck it. At least these are happy tears. Her body is completely relaxed against mine, her mind distracted from the pain and exhaustion for the first time since she started pushing. A little smile plays at her lips. "I love you so much, Roman."
"I love you too. You ready to finish this now, little warrior?"
She takes a deep breath and then nods.
"Whenever you're ready, Mila. One more big push." Dr. Tanner glances up at her and smiles.
"Bring our girl home, baby," I whisper and kiss her cheek.
Mila takes another deep breath and then pushes.
"Keep going," Dr. Tanner encourages. "She's almost here."
Mila's body tenses. Her face turns beet red. She pushes with everything in her. I hold her through it, whispering encouragement in her ear. And when she cries out this time, it's a cry of triumph.
Tears fill my eyes as she falls back against my chest, and Dr. Tanner passes little Stella to a nurse, who quickly suctions out her mouth and then passes her to one of the other nurses in the room. Our baby girl cries loudly, flailing her little arms and legs.
I want to snatch her out of their arms and keep her all to myself, but I can't. I promised Mila we would do this together, and she's not done yet. There's a flurry of motion around us as Dr. Tanner and his team continue working on her. Someone asks if I want to cut the cord. When I nod, they move around and allow me to cut the cord from where I am. They rush around as soon as I do, cleaning her up and taking measurements.
Within moments, a nurse steps up beside the bed with little Stella in her arms.