Total pages in book: 92
Estimated words: 85154 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85154 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Of course, he would ask me this. I take a deep inhale as I try to get my heart under control so I don’t lose my handle on the tears but then I just collapse. “I don’t know really.” I put my hand on the counter as I look over his shoulder toward the window. “I’m a bit all over the place,” I finally get out. “I went to work today just so I wouldn’t sit down and have to think about it.” I look at him and see his eyes stare into mine. “If I stop and take a minute, I’m afraid I’m going to completely fall apart.” I blink away quickly as my eyes start to burn. “And no one has time for that.” I see him take a step toward me and I hold up my hand to stop him. “If you go soft on me, I’m going to take back my marriage proposal.”
He takes a huge inhale before he looks at me. “Make the appointment.”
I smile so big. “Tomorrow morning at ten.”
He stares at me as his mouth hangs open, then closes when he presses his teeth together and hisses out, “Fine, text me the address.”
“Will do. Do you mind if I get out of here?” I ask, motioning with my head to the front door. “I need to just…”
“Go.” He pushes off from the counter. “Text me when you get home.”
“You literally have my location on your phone,” I remind him as he walks me to the front door. He opens the door for me, and I get on my tippy-toes to kiss his cheek. “Thank you for tonight,” I tell him, “and also, you should open a couple of windows; it smells like a frat house in here. Like feet and Doritos.”
He huffs again. “It’s my gym bag.” He points at the bag beside our feet.
“It also smells like—” He puts a finger on my lips.
“I haven’t had sex here in over a month, if not longer, so now I know you’re lying.” His eyes shine bright.
I push his finger away from my mouth. “I was going to say it smells like Axe body spray.” I turn to walk out of his place and to the elevator.
“You can stop watching me now,” I call over my shoulder.
“I’m just making sure that you get in the elevator safe.” He leans against the doorjamb. “Besides, if you end up on Dateline, I’m not going to be the asshole who didn’t watch you get into the elevator.”
The elevator pings, and I step into it, pressing the L button before looking at him. “You can close your door now. If I get murdered, you’ll look like a bang-up guy who didn’t even walk me to my car.” He looks at me, shocked. “After my sister died,” I toss out right before the doors close and see him racing toward the elevator. I can’t help the tears from rolling down my cheeks as I swallow down the lump in my throat. Today has, without a doubt, been the hardest day I’ve ever had, and even when I buried my grandmother, this is ten times worse because of Cici. I went to work thinking everything was going to be okay, but it wasn’t. I told Raquel, and she told me she would take care of everything. For once, I let her, and I spent the rest of the time on the phone with Lisa’s lawyer and then my lawyer. I wasn’t surprised Lisa had everything in place. That was just the thing she would do to make sure she was taken care of and so was Cici. She never wanted to be a burden to anyone, not even in death.
I don’t even know how I make it home. I don’t even know what route I took or if there was traffic. All I know is I walk into my house and go straight for the stairs to my bedroom. My house. A house I worked my ass off to buy. A house that is small but perfect. A house I’ve wanted all my life.
I walk through my bedroom to my bathroom, turning on the water in the tub before sliding out of my jeans and T-shirt. The room is in darkness still, the only light is from the outside coming into the open shades. I sink into the deep tub I had put in after I moved in, because the tub before was small and I wanted to be able to sink into the water. I submerge into the water, wetting my hair. I tilt my head back before coming out of the water. This time I don’t know if it’s my tears that are wetting my face or if it’s the water from the bath. I look to the side as memories of my sister run through my head like a movie over and over again. Staying in the water until it’s ice cold, I slip on my robe and head straight to my bed. Tossing the covers back, I don’t even bother taking off the throw pillows before putting my head down.