Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 64392 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 322(@200wpm)___ 258(@250wpm)___ 215(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 64392 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 322(@200wpm)___ 258(@250wpm)___ 215(@300wpm)
I run out of treats for her just before we get back to the apartment. As we wait to cross the street, she lifts up on her hind legs and nuzzles me more firmly with her nose, lifting a paw and pulling at my arm.
“We are almost home, and I will feed you properly then,” I tell her. “Sit down until then.”
She stays up on her hind legs for a long moment, testing the order.
“Down,” I say firmly.
She sits with a little whimper.
What a good girl.
Later, Kira sits nicely in the kitchen as I fry steak after steak. I was going to feed her raw, but having seen her in action, I am starting to wonder if her gut will be able to handle it. She’s a bit sensitive, and that sensitivity might very well translate to her tummy.
Before I can plate her meal, she starts to whine as if she is in pain. It could be because she’s consumed half the junk food in the city, or it could be because… oh the poor thing. She drops to her side and starts to writhe as her wolf form starts to slide away from her.
Staying in the animal form for long periods of time is not easy. It takes energy at first. Over time it will become something she can do, but for the moment, she is subject to the capacities of her flesh.
Shifting hurts. It is a brutal process that involves the complete transformation of blood and bone. The first transformations are the hardest. Over time, her body will adjust, but for the moment, the sight is one of mild horror as her fur falls out around her, a complete coat shedding in a matter of minutes. Her body twists and shrinks in some ways, extending in others.
I sit with her as it happens, stroking her head as her human hair flows from her scalp once more, her muzzle shortening to her cute little nose and her sweet lips. She passes out halfway through, which is a mercy.
I pick her insensate form up and settle her on the couch. She will sleep for a while now. This time I will not leave her. I may never leave her side again. I cover her up with a blanket and put a cushion under her head, wishing I could do more, even though I know there’s nothing more I can do.
Kira is not the only one who has been transformed today. I started this morning as a lone wolf, but she has made me a mate. She has reoriented my world entirely.
I love her.
But love is not enough of a word for it. It completely fails to encapsulate the feeling. I feel protective to a degree I’ve never felt before, even as an alpha. I feel devotion. I feel fear. Fear of loss. Fear of all that could happen to her. Fear as I realize that one day, something inevitably will happen to her, or to me. I am feeling love of the kind that makes the basic machinations of the universe, the cycle of birth and death feel wrong. Deeply wrong. We should be able to live forever, she and I. We should have always been together, and we should be together for eternity.
I sit beside her, I stroke her hair and her back, and I wait for her to regain consciousness. The day turns to night ever so slowly, fading to orange and then losing color entirely to be replaced with the bright neons of the world beyond our window.
My stomach growls, and I realize I haven’t eaten. I didn’t feel the need to eat. My needs no longer seem to matter as long as she is safe. If I am touching her, I have everything I need.
She stirs next to me, stretches her legs, yawns in a long, slow way that no human ever yawns, and every wolf always yawns. I adore the sight of it.
Her eyes meet mine, filling with confusion as they do.
“What is happening?”
“You’re safe,” I tell her. It is the most important thing for her to know.
“I’ve been having the weirdest dream. It was so vivid. And so…” She blinks. “Where am I?”
“You’re at my apartment. Well, one of them. A sort of cozy bolt-hole. Somewhere people don’t think to find me.”
“Just a subtle basic little place adjacent to the park,” she says, mocking me just a little. I am glad to hear it. It means she’s feeling better.
“Quite.”
There is a problem now. Do I tell her she is a wolf? Or do I let her believe she’s been dreaming all this time?
She lifts the blanket and looks down at herself, then back up at me. “Why am I naked?”
“You were tired.”
Her expression becomes deeply dubious. “I don’t get tired like that. I’d remember leaving the office and being naked in your apartment.” She sits up and runs her hand through her messy hair, looking at me with those beautiful brown eyes that hold so much vulnerability.