Total pages in book: 85
Estimated words: 80620 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 403(@200wpm)___ 322(@250wpm)___ 269(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 80620 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 403(@200wpm)___ 322(@250wpm)___ 269(@300wpm)
My eyes slide back to Aiden, who has a mixture of regret and embarrassment on his face as he stares at Josie.
“But yes,” she continues, and we both look back to her. “He’s a good guy, and I think you should have lunch with him sometime here at the hospital.”
“Well, that was awkward,” Aiden mutters as he pushes up out of the chair. Josie doesn’t look chagrined in the slightest.
I’m surprised when Aiden bends over and presses a swift kiss to the top of Josie’s head and says, “You’re a brat.”
A soft laugh flows out of Josie’s mouth, and it makes Aiden smile at her as he shakes his head. He then turns to look back to me. “It was nice meeting you, Gracen.”
“Likewise,” I say, feeling a bit bad for him. Josie just totally ruined his game, so I add, “And I’d like to meet up for lunch sometime.”
Aiden’s grin splits so wide, and is so dazzling for a moment, I can’t help but smile back at him. “Awesome. I’ll get your number from Josie later.”
After Aiden leaves, Josie starts packing the rest of her sandwich back into the plastic wrapper. “And my ten minutes are up. I need to get back.”
“The life of an ER doctor,” I say with a laugh before taking another bite of my sandwich.
“Seriously, though,” Josie says as she stands up. “Aiden is a good guy. You know, if you’re interested in dating.”
I shake my head as I measure my feelings right now. Aiden was a really nice guy, and getting to know him as a friend would be fine, but for some reason it feels like a betrayal to do so. “I’m really not, Josie. Maybe in time.”
As if she could read my thoughts, she leans in toward me, placing a palm on the table. “You don’t owe Marek anything. You may be living there and coparenting with him, but you are free to date others.”
“And that kiss?” I murmur softly, feeling ashamed it meant something to me and not to him.
“What kiss?” she asks with an arched eyebrow. “You said it can’t have any meaning.”
I give a sigh of frustration. “But just because it can’t have meaning doesn’t mean it doesn’t.”
“I’m not following,” she replies, her eyes filled with concern.
“You need to get back to work.”
She ignores my brush-off. “I can spare a few more minutes.”
“Don’t bother,” I say with a forced smile. “It’s really nothing worth talking about. I’ll admit I still have some feelings for Marek, so the kiss meant something to me. But he doesn’t have those feelings anymore for me. They’ve been gone for a long time, as evidenced by the fact he broke up with me. I’ve just got to remember that and focus on helping him to build a better relationship with Lilly.”
“I think you’re wrong,” Josie says, and I blink at her in surprise.
“You don’t know Marek. I’m not wrong.”
“He might be angry, Gracen,” Josie says with such surety she makes me pay attention to what she’s saying. “But he loved you at one point, and you bore his child. I don’t care what ugly feelings exist, there is going to be a part of Marek that loves and respects what you gave him as a father. That could be something to build on.”
I’m shaking my head without giving any thought to that. “Impossible.”
“Why?”
“Because put aside for one minute that Marek is angry with what I did to him—keeping Lilly from him,” I say in the barest whisper. I take a deep breath, let it out. “Put that aside and realize Marek betrayed me too. He broke my heart and left me when I was vulnerable. I might not be having the same feelings of anger, but don’t think that what he did to me isn’t without consequences. I don’t know that I could ever trust loving him again.”
Josie’s face goes pale as she takes in what I just said. She swallows and gives a slight nod. “I hadn’t really thought about that.”
“Well, I have,” I tell her. “A lot. For years, actually. I had these stupid fantasies that one day Marek would sweep back into my life and tell me what an idiot he was for leaving and that I was his true soul mate. The only woman he’d ever love. And as every week, month…hell, as the years went by, I realized that was nothing more than wishful, pathetic thinking. There’s nothing to build upon between Marek and me because despite how much I still care for him, I don’t think I could ever trust him again not to break my heart.”
Josie just stares at me a moment, then surprises me by moving around the table to squat down beside my chair. She takes one of my hands in hers and squeezes. “I’m sorry. And I know what you’re feeling. I felt the same exact thing with Aiden once upon a time. The only thing I can tell you is that time will heal those wounds. And maybe it’s not meant to be Marek for you. Hell, maybe it’s Aiden or some other hot dude that would worship the ground you walk on. My only advice to you is to be open to it. Don’t close yourself off to possibility.”