Total pages in book: 53
Estimated words: 49562 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 248(@200wpm)___ 198(@250wpm)___ 165(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 49562 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 248(@200wpm)___ 198(@250wpm)___ 165(@300wpm)
“It’s true.” She laughed at her own words. “Nero is just a bit sick, so I came out here to get him some mint for tea, but a rabbit must’ve eaten some for lunch.”
“Ah.” He nodded, understanding now. He got on the ground and began to take over. “I’ll fix this up while you go fix him some tea.”
“Thank you.” She smiled at him, and the stress washed away from her almost immediately before it returned when she got a good look at him. “Lucca, when was the last time you got some sleep?”
He decided not saying anything was better than telling her he had yet to sleep in the last twenty-four hours, and there was no point in lying because she always knew when he did.
Melissa took a deep breath. “You’re putting too much pressure on yourself to be something you don’t have to be.”
Usually, he was silent in the matter, always letting her say her piece, but his lack of sleep didn’t want him hearing this conversation for the millionth time. “Mom, please.”
“I’m just saying, you don’t have to follow in your father’s footsteps, is all,” she reiterated.
“It’s not his footsteps I’m following …” he finally explained, his voice turning dark. “This is who I am.” It didn’t matter if his father was the mob boss of the Caruso family or not; Lucca would one day become the king of Kansas City, even if his father were a tailor.
“No, you’re much more,” his mother assured him sweetly, tucking a fallen strand of hair back behind his ear. “One day, you’ll understand when you have your own children why I only want the best for you and why I refuse to believe you’re no longer worth saving, like you think you are.”
“If you knew the things I’ve done, you wouldn’t say that,” he mumbled under his breath.
“You think I don’t know?” she revealed. “You forget who took you to all your therapist and psychiatric appointments.”
“I remember. Just didn’t think you wanted to believe them.”
“I didn’t have to be told there was something different about my children; that’s why I took you in the first place. Mothers can sense when something is wrong with their child. Stomachaches or colds might be easier to recognize, but that doesn’t mean we don’t notice your interactions with others. I wanted to get you the help I could while you were still young enough to make a difference.”
Lucca suddenly ceased what he was doing. He hadn’t known that.
“And then I stopped taking you and Maria when I got scared they would label you both dangerous to others and break their code of confidentiality.”
He wasn’t sure at which age it was that he had been diagnosed with ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder), but he was sure it was quite alarming for her to find out two of her four children were fucked in the head. The verdict was still out on his younger brother, Nero, as he was only twelve, and while it was obvious there was something up with him and Maria at that age, Nero appeared to be different. He had flashes of darkness every now and then, but it was nothing compared to his.
Their youngest brother, however, was perfect. Even as a baby, it was obvious how much Leo was going to take after their mom. Lucca remembered being happy for the first time in his life when he had realized it, grateful that their mother would at least have one normal child, because she definitely didn’t deserve the other children their father’s genes had given her.
“You see, I’ll always do my best to protect you in this life and the next.”
He didn’t believe in such things, but if there was … “I don’t think we will be going to the same place.”
“I’ve been taught that any man, no matter what they’ve done, can seek salvation, and you, my son, are no different.”
“Mom, I’ve told you—”
“I understand that salvation isn’t going to come to you by going to church …”
Lucca stared into her eyes and saw she wholeheartedly believed every word she was about to say.
“You’ll find your salvation in a woman, just like your father did.” She smiled proudly at him, as if she could see the future.
Doubtful. While his father clearly had the heart for love, Lucca didn’t. He never could see himself falling head over heels for a woman, like Dante had.
Practically hearing her young, naïve son’s thoughts, Melissa laughed as she tucked a strand of his hair back behind his ear again. “Oh, I have every faith you’ll find the love of your life one day, but you might want to get a haircut first so you don’t scare her away.”
Plucking some mint leaves, he handed them to his mother, not having the heart to tell her he’d never do such a thing, as it would make him weak, just like it had made his father weak. As the king of Kansas City, the less you loved, the better. That was the one thing—the only thing—Lucca had been born to do.