Total pages in book: 66
Estimated words: 62737 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 314(@200wpm)___ 251(@250wpm)___ 209(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 62737 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 314(@200wpm)___ 251(@250wpm)___ 209(@300wpm)
“Any idea where he could be?”
I sighed in annoyance. “If I did, I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be sitting on my ass in the dark.”
Ash wasn’t a smartass in response. “Any leads? Any moles?”
“I’ve checked them all…nothing.”
“We’ll keep looking,” Ash said. “I’m with you on this…til the end.”
I dragged my hands down my face, furious that I had no idea how to fix this. My wife was the victim of god-knows-what, and I was sitting on my ass doing nothing. I pulled my hands away and let a few tears escape. I loved this woman so much that I would smile if I could take her place. Loving her was like living with my heart outside my body. It was vulnerable, delicate, and she carried it in her hand. Whatever happened to her happened to me.
Ash glanced at me from the corner of his eye before he wrapped his arm around my shoulders, giving me affection I hadn’t expected. We hadn’t embraced each other as brothers in over five years. As if my father hadn’t been killed by my hand, he was loyal to me. He was there for me. “I’m sorry, man. You don’t deserve this.”
“I’m surprised you would say that.”
“You shouldn’t be.” He gently rubbed my back before he dropped his hand. “It’s time we leave the past in the past. Mom and Dad are gone, but we have each other. Let’s move on—starting now.”
I turned my gaze to meet his look, my eyes wide because I couldn’t believe what he’d just said. “Does that mean…that you forgive me?” I spoke the question out loud, unable to believe we were having this conversation at all.
“Yeah,” he said quietly. “I do.”
Instead of feeling joy, I felt devastation. I’d accomplished what I set out to do, but it didn’t make any difference at all. My wife wasn’t here. She couldn’t love me when she was being tortured and god-knew-what.
Or if she was dead.
His statement only made me feel worse, made me feel like I’d lost even more.
4
Sofia
It started to feel like fall.
The trees and meadow in the distance were changing colors. The deep green of summer slowly faded to autumn, tints of red and yellow. I sat on the balcony and tried to focus on the innate beauty around me. If I focused hard enough, I wouldn’t have to think about my own reality.
What I had to do every night.
I stayed in this bedroom and took my meals on the balcony. I wasn’t allowed to leave, so this room became my whole world. When I looked across the countryside, sometimes I imagined that I saw Hades and his men coming for me, in armored trucks and with weapons.
But then I blinked and realized it was a hallucination.
As every night passed and my mind became more disturbed, I considered the option Maddox had offered me.
All I had to do was pull the trigger.
If no one cared about me, I’d probably do it, but Hades would never recover. My mother would be alone. And Maddox would win. I had to stay alive long enough to be saved. I had to have faith that Hades would come.
I couldn’t give up on him.
Not when he would never give up on me.
So I blocked everything out of my mind and pretended this wasn’t happening. I became my own therapist, trained myself to repress the horror that was taking place. If I compartmentalized everything, I could pretend it wasn’t happening at all.
Footsteps sounded behind me, and I recognized their heaviness. They usually only came during the night, but it was the middle of the day now.
Maddox fell into the chair beside me, his knees wide apart as he stretched out. He surveyed the countryside in front of him, as if he were more interested in the view than he was in me.
My heart started to palpitate. I hated being close to him, hated being in the same vicinity. I crossed my legs and immediately shifted my body away from him. I did my best to not think about the horrible things he was doing to me, but when he was right beside me, that was impossible to do.
He sat in silence for a long time, enjoying the quiet companionship.
I wanted him to leave, so I stayed quiet in the hope he would eventually walk off.
But he stayed.
I finally spoke. “Is there something I can help you with?” I didn’t want this man to infringe on my peaceful afternoon, on the time designated for myself. The abrasive woman inside me wanted to throw him out of my bedroom, but this guy was freakishly strong. It was best not to provoke him.
“No.”
I stared straight ahead and hoped he would leave on his own.
“Are you enjoying your time here?”
It was so ridiculous, I almost did a double take. “Is that a serious question?”