Total pages in book: 79
Estimated words: 80074 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 400(@200wpm)___ 320(@250wpm)___ 267(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 80074 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 400(@200wpm)___ 320(@250wpm)___ 267(@300wpm)
Words could hold so much power with the ability to cut you open like blades. There was no goin’ back, only forward, and he said his piece in all this.
“I’m keepin’ it.”
“You can’t be serious. You have your whole life ahead of you. This is just gonna fuck it all up.”
“Well, this baby is my fuck up, you selfish asshole!”
“I can’t be part of this, I’ve come too far. You have no idea what I’ve been through to just be standin’ in this piece of shit apartment. If you do this, Harley, you’re on your own ’cuz I want no part in it.”
My heart dropped.
It was loud.
It was clear.
It was everything that was left of me.
Words couldn’t describe the sentiments surgin’ through my body, the turmoil and devastation takin’ residence inside of me. Reality set in, I’d be raisin’ this baby by myself.
The last piece of my heart was taken away from me.
By Cash.
My very best friend.
A part I knew I would never get back. No matter how much I wanted to. No matter how many times I’d prayed.
The burden was mine to carry.
I made my bed, now I had to lay in it.
Adding to the endless pile of things I didn’t have anymore. Things I could never get back. The damage was already done.
“Don’t you worry, Cash fuckin’ McGraw. No one will know it’s yours. I’ll raise it on my own. Is that what you want?”
It literally hurt me to say that to him. I stood there on pins and needles, waiting for somethin’
Anythin’.
For him to choose us over his dreams.
When he turned to face me, his internal struggle was written clear across his tormented expression.
He swallowed, and for a split second, I thought he was goin’ to say no, he didn’t mean it.
He’d be there for me.
For us...
Instead, he killed me.
Replyin’, “I’m sorry, Harley. I can’t be your hero this time.”
Chapter 27
<>Jackson<>
Then: Twenty-one-years-old
I hadn’t seen or heard from Harley since the morning I found out about Cash and their drunken night together. Longest two months of my fuckin’ life. Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months without my girl.
My everything.
Leaving an empty shell of a man walking through the motions of daily life. Submerging myself in nothing but football and classes.
Alone.
Day and night.
Summer was in full effect, and I was back in Oak Island, staying with my parents for a week before heading back to start football camp. I knew Harley was there. It was the only chance I’d get to see her on neutral territory.
Knowing exactly where I’d find her. The only place she thought I wouldn’t dare to go looking for her.
My feet moved of their own accord up the empty beach until my heart dropped to the sand beneath me. Crumbling right then and there when I spotted her and all her beauty from a distance. My whole world came crashing down in a matter of seconds. Everything I thought I had under control, everything I wanted to believe, all of it ... gone.
I saw her.
And I fuckin’ knew.
My girl sat there on a blanket with her arms wrapped around her knees, hiding her face. The tiny frame I adored so much shook uncontrollably. Only heightening the deepest sobbing that escalated with each passing second.
It was such an intimate moment, not to be shared with anyone, especially me. Harley didn’t cry. Yet there she was, bawling her fuckin’ eyes out. Shaking me to my core, slicing me whole, making me feel like I was dying inside. Carving a memory within me I would take to my grave.
There was no going back...
I would forever close my eyes and see her falling apart in front of me.
I found it hard to breathe.
Hard to move.
Hard to say one damn thing.
My feet were glued to the goddamn sand as she continued to weep, sob, bawl, violently sucking in air that her lungs were denied.
I accepted it all.
Each tear that fell from her face became a piece of me. Circulating through my blood and veins, flowing endlessly like a river of her sadness and sorrow, mixed with all our bullshit over the years.
There was no beginning or ending to her cries, just an infinite current, flooding the hole where my heart should be. The shadow of her trembling, petite frame reflected off the water, leaving a trail of regret in its wake.
Mine.
Hers.
Ours.
There was always that one moment in life where things could have been different.
That one moment that changed the course of your life or the direction you could have taken.
That one moment that could forever change you and everything you wanted to be true. Everything you wanted to believe in.
One simple decision could alter your entire future.
My entire world.
I gave her the only comfort I could in her moment of despair.
Speaking with nothing but conviction, “I’ll say it’s mine.”