Series: Willow Winters
Total pages in book: 53
Estimated words: 50025 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 167(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 50025 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 167(@300wpm)
“I don’t want you two to take care of all my problems and not even tell me about them.” Ella shakes her head, her long hair swishing around her shoulders. Swallowing thickly, she says, “I should know.”
“Ella,” I say and her name is a warning.
“You just have to tell me,” she says, her tone pleading.
Defiant. All I can think right now is that she’s being defiant and this will play out one of two ways. I give her nothing but silence.
With a frustrated sigh, Ella pushes past me. I follow quietly behind her, deciding how exactly to handle this. To handle her. She moves quickly through the house and to the kitchen, where she opens one cupboard, then the next. A box of tea appears in her hand and she puts it down hard on the countertop.
“Ella, stop.”
“I’m having tea,” she says, her voice high and strained. “That’s all I’m doing. If you won’t talk to me, then I’m going to sit down and have a cup of tea.” The water rushes down as she fills the kettle. Once it’s filled, she turns it off with pent-up anger and adds, “Is there a problem with that?”
I cross to her in two steps and take her chin in my hand. The kettle lands hard on the counter and her shocked eyes look up at me.
Her chest rises and falls quickly. She’s going to break down in a few minutes if I don’t stop this, and I will stop this. Ella doesn’t need to be swept up in fear.
It’s just that now isn’t the time to tell her.
“Jailbird, I’m sorry you overheard our conversation. We should have had it elsewhere.”
She lets out a shaky breath. “No, you should include me,” she pleads.
“No.” My voice is firm. “I’m not going to tell you at this moment.”
“Is it bad?” she whispers and I tell her it’s nothing I can’t handle.
With her lips pressed in a thin line, she stares past me, not at all happy.
“I apologize for causing you fear and distress, but now’s not the time for you and me to discuss the topic. You need to be reminded of the rules.” I keep my voice quiet. “The way you’re acting right now makes me think you’re being purposely disobedient.”
Those last two words do exactly what I’d like them to do.
A new flush comes to her cheeks. Telling Ella she’s acting out deliberately is the same as telling her I’m going to punish her, and she loves to be punished. It reinforces our connection to one another and it’s a healthy release for her. It would probably do her good.
She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “I’m not disobeying, Z.”
“Look at me.” Her dark eyes move to mine and stay locked on me. “Good girl.” I tuck her hair behind her ear and her eyelids go heavy at the simple touch. “We will discuss this in our next session. All right?”
“I would appreciate it if you didn’t keep things from me,” she says, her voice shaking. “I think you should put an end to all this and just tell me what I need to know.”
No.
Instinctively I understand that speaking to her about it now would only make the situation more fraught. I don’t have a plan for what to say, and talking about this with Ella requires serious consideration, not spontaneity. There is far too much on the line to leave things to chance. I will tell her when I know exactly how it will be handled and ended. That way she’ll have nothing to concern herself with.
“I’m taking you to dinner.” There. That’s a decision. Move our venue. Give us both some time to reset and calm down.
Ella’s expression falters. “I know that’s not what you were talking to Kam about.”
“No, jailbird, it wasn’t. But I’m not ready to talk about it with you. And you’re not ready to hear it.”
“Z …”
“Do you trust me?”
She bites her lip. “Yes.”
“I know it’s hard, jailbird, but you need to keep trusting me now.”
“Well, it feels like you don’t trust me. It feels like you’re hiding something because you think I’m too fragile.”
“That isn’t the case.” She tries to look down and away. “Ella. You are not weak. You’re my submissive and I provide for you. This is what I want from you. Control in all things. I crave your burdens. Give them to me.”
There’s a shift. It’s slight, but it’s there. “But …”
“Trust me.”
I know what I’m asking from her, and it’s not easy to give it. But if we’re going to get through this, and we are going to get through this, we need to be able to sit in these uncomfortable spaces.”
Ella gives a shallow nod.
I lean down and kiss her.
When our lips touch, it doesn’t erase the tension. I can still feel it in her body. But on a physical level, there’s no misunderstanding between us. It’s her lips against mine and then her tongue against mine, both of us seeking the other. It makes me hot for her. Too hot.