Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 96586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 483(@200wpm)___ 386(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 483(@200wpm)___ 386(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
“I know,” she forcefully replies. “You hurting me is not even something that crosses my mind, Ry. I’ve forgiven you for that pain, babe. Please, learn to forgive yourself.”
“How can I? I could’ve fucking killed you.”
“But you didn’t. And beating yourself up over could’ves and would’ves and should’ves isn’t going to help you stay clean. It’s going to make you want something to numb the pain, and we – those who love you and care about you – don’t want you in pain. We want you healing. And hopeful. And happy.”
Melting into her words is followed by one arm draping itself over her legs to pull her closer to me.
Secure me in this moment.
Slay the demon that threatens to rise from the dead every time stress gets a little too unmanageable.
“So,” Pres adoringly tugs at the damp strands, “what happened today?”
“It was just a shit day. Ten-hour shift that should’ve only been fucking six. Customers were assholes. I’m so fucking broke I’ve barely got enough gas to get me to payday and had to borrow money from Big Roscoe to get lunch at the goddamn gas station because they have a two hotdogs for ninety-nine cents deal.”
She audibly gags at the idea.
“All that shit aside, the only thing I wanted for my fucking birthday was to be with you, but you…and I know how fucking selfish this shit sounds…just work so goddamn much that sometimes I feel like I’m dating your fucking profile picture on my phone.”
“Ry, I love what I do.”
“Yeah,” Leaning into the pulls, I quietly plead, “but I need to feel like you love me, too.”
It takes a longer stretch than I’m expecting for her to speak. “Okay.”
My head angles itself upward for my chin to rest on her leg while our stares connect. “Okay, what?”
“Okay,” she softly repeats. “You’re expressing a need, and I’m telling you I hear you. I…am acknowledging you. And we can work on ways that you feel less like you’re dating our text thread rather than me.”
Unexpected relief has my shoulders sagging and a question naturally sliding out. “Will you start coming with me to my weekly dinners at Noah’s?”
“Will he mind?”
“Don’t care.”
She lightly snickers and gives my cheek an affectionate cupping. “As long as he doesn’t mind, I will rearrange my schedule whenever possible to go with you and on those nights, how about you crash at my place, so that there’s always at least one night a week we’re together.”
“I like that.”
“Good because you’re gonna hate what comes next.”
“Then don’t say it. Don’t ruin my birthday.”
“We’re swinging by the ATM in the morning and you’re taking cash from me-”
“No.” Anger runs its way up my spine, moving me into a sitting position as well. “Fuck no.”
“Fuck yes,” she aggressively snaps back. “I don’t want the man I love fucking starving between pay checks, so get over it. Pay your boss back and use the rest of the money to eat, get gas, and whatever else you need until payday.”
“Pres-”
“This isn’t a discussion, birthday babe. It’s what’s fucking happening.”
Arousal and aggravation intertwine inside. “Fuck, fine. But I’ll pay you back. Every. Goddamn. Cent.”
“You won’t.” She warmly wraps her arms around my neck. “Because that’s not how real relationships work, Ry. It’s a give and take.”
“It seems like all I do is take.”
I’m tossed an unexpected wink. “You give plenty…”
Loud laughter escapes as I pull her into my lap. “Why don’t I give you something right now then?”
“You don’t want me to go ahead and order dinner?”
My hands slowly slide along the curve of her back heading straight for her ass. “One more round first.”
Pres’s giggles are short lived by my lips planting themselves on hers.
Maybe this shit is supposed to be give and take, but fuck, I am tired of taking.
I look forward to the days where I can give more than my dick and dish duty.
I hope that shit is coming sooner rather than later.
Even if it isn’t?
I’m thankful she loves me anyway.
That’s really the birthday wish that’s already come true.
Chapter 17
Presley
Discussion Topic 9: Don’t Think for Others
“These stuffed mushrooms are amazing,” I gush to Shelly from across the table. “You’re an amazing cook. And I’m totally jealous.”
“Absolutely what a woman should hear more often,” she playfully scolds Noah who is seated beside her.
“I always mention what a great cook you are,” he sweetly argues between bites of bread. “It usually falls before great mother and right after how beautiful you are.”
Laughter from me is echoed by Shelby prompting me to peer around my boyfriend to get a better view of their shenanigans.
She joyfully squishes up her mashed peas even more in her hand and then offers her uncle the bite. Ry makes a huge gasp, dives his face in, and pretends to munch away every bite like a ravenous Cookie Monster. His niece gleefully giggles and pushes away his face to quickly repeat the playful action.