Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 121996 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 610(@200wpm)___ 488(@250wpm)___ 407(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 121996 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 610(@200wpm)___ 488(@250wpm)___ 407(@300wpm)
“You’ve been avoiding me.” I clarify. “I want to know what the issue is.”
She dips her head, her shoulders relaxing slightly as she considers it for a moment. Then she reaches for her phone to write out a response.
I’m not avoiding you. And there is no issue.
She’s lying, and she’s not doing a very good job of hiding it. She can barely look at me. When I pass her in the house, she continues without so much as an acknowledgment. It’s grating at me, and even more so, because I want to know why.
“I don’t want to let what happened interfere with Nino’s care,” I tell her.
I would never. She shakes her head. It’s already forgotten.
My jaw clenches, and I can’t tell if she’s intentionally goading me, but it feels like it. I should let it go, but I can’t.
“You’re angry with me.”
No, I’m not, she insists.
I study her, searching for a deeper answer. “Is it because of Gwen?”
She shakes her head again, and it’s infuriating. I want her to look at me. I want … something, but I don’t even know what it is.
“She can come off harsh,” I grit out. “She struggles with her emotions because she’s been through a lot, but I’ve spoken to her, and there shouldn’t be any more trouble.”
Natalia nods, and that’s all I get. Her response only serves to irritate me further.
“She has a point, though,” I say. “It’s not your place to tell Nino what he should and shouldn’t do. She is his grandmother.”
I know I’m goading her now, but I’m not expecting her eyes to alight with fire as she glares back at me. Suddenly, she has plenty to say.
No, it’s not my place, Alessio. But someone had to do it. You aren’t around, and when you are, you have no idea what’s going on with him. He needs guidance. He needs reassurance. And I will die on this hill before I allow a grown woman to bully him into feeling responsible for her bruised ego. It’s important for children to feel safe to set boundaries around their bodies. He did that, and she wanted to trample right over it. And when that didn’t work, she used emotional manipulation. If she’s been through hard times, that sucks, but we all have to accept responsibility for our own healing. Nino isn’t comfortable doing what she asks of him, and it’s your job to protect him and tell him that’s okay, but clearly, you haven’t.
My temples throb as I listen to her words and lift my gaze back to her. It isn’t often I can’t rein in my emotions, but right now there’s no holding back from either of us.
“Everything I do is to protect him,” I snarl, rising to my feet to glare down at her. “You know nothing about his life. You know nothing about Gwen or me, and if you ever talk about her that way again, you are fucking done here. Do you understand that?”
She flinches back as if she’s preparing for a personal attack, and before I can make sense of it, her lip begins to tremble. She lowers her gaze to hide the hurt and fear in her eyes, but I can’t unsee them. For a second, I’m questioning myself. I’m questioning everything. I’m starting to think Gwen was right all along. This was never going to work.
I stare at Natalia, wishing I could just say the goddamned words. To go get her shit and leave and never come back. That would be the best thing for both of us, but we both know we’re in far too deep for that. She knows what I do. She’s seen too much.
Despite her best efforts to hold them back, a tear splashes against her face, and I feel like a fucking asshole. My instinct is to fix this somehow, but I’m still too raw over what she said, and even if I wasn’t, I don’t know how. This is exactly what I don’t want. These complications. The messiness that comes with human connections.
I need space. I need to go to the gym and punish my body, and then fist my dick until I purge every indecent thought I’ve ever had about her.
It’s the only logical solution.
I spend the day trying to dispel the reminder of what happened this afternoon. I put my body through the paces of hell in the gym. I have a couple of stiff drinks for lunch. I consider going to the Cat House for a release, because I want to prove a point to Natalia, but the idea is driven by my anger and not desire. The truth is none of those women sound even remotely appealing right now.
I want her, and apparently, nothing can alter that.
I use Manuel as my carrier pigeon to deliver the news to Natalia that she has the rest of the day off. I don’t ask him how she takes it, and I don’t want to know. I give him the rest of the day off, too, opting to pick up Nino myself. He’s supposed to have piano lessons and Italian studies this afternoon, but I think perhaps he could use a break.