Total pages in book: 48
Estimated words: 46699 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 233(@200wpm)___ 187(@250wpm)___ 156(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 46699 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 233(@200wpm)___ 187(@250wpm)___ 156(@300wpm)
Gabriel was still staring at him blankly, his face pale.
Jared turned to the door, but stopped and looked back for the last time: at curly dark-blond hair and the green eyes he loved so much and the vulnerable curve of Gabriel’s lips. They were trembling as Gabriel struggled to say something.
Jared’s feet moved of their own volition. His hands cradled Gabriel’s face. “I’m proud of you,” he said hoarsely, pressing their foreheads together. He took a deep breath in, inhaling his scent greedily. Gabriel. His Gabe. “Remember that.” He brushed his lips against the corner of Gabriel’s mouth and felt Gabriel’s lips tremble. He kissed the other corner and whispered, “Goodbye, Gabi.”
He stared pulling back, but Gabriel grabbed his shirt, his eyes wet and pleading.
“Let go,” Jared said, looking away. He couldn’t look at him. He didn’t think he was strong enough to keep saying no when Gabriel was looking at him like that.
Silence.
Then he felt Gabriel’s fingers unclench slowly, releasing him.
It should have felt like relief.
It didn’t.
He took a step back, unlocked the door and left the restroom.
Ignoring the reporters, he walked away, the hollow feeling in his chest growing with every step he took.
Goodbye.
PART II: ADRIFT
Chapter 5: Claire
Her bladder woke her up in the middle of the night. Claire opened her eyes blearily and rubbed them. A quick glance showed the other side of the bed was empty. Gabriel wasn’t in bed again.
She pursed her lips and sat up with difficulty. God, she was only seven and a half months along, but she felt like a small elephant. She wasn’t sure she could bear another two months of this. Maybe they really should have waited, as Gabriel had wanted: they had enough problems already without a baby in the mix. Gabriel’s reaction to her pregnancy hadn’t been as good as Claire had hoped. His mood seemed to be deteriorating as the pregnancy progressed and she wasn’t the only one who had noticed. Thank God Gabriel’s PR manager had at least managed to quiet the scandal caused by Gabriel’s behavior in the opening match of the season—he’d planted the rumor that Gabriel was just taking the news of his doctor’s leaving hard. The public and mainstream press had accepted the explanation: the story of Gabriel’s miraculous recovery from his spinal cord injury was widely known. It was a good explanation.
It was a good explanation because it was the truth.
Sometimes she wished it wasn’t.
Claire heaved a sigh. To be completely honest, she’d been a little glad when she’d found out that Jared was leaving England.
She liked Jared—he was impossible to dislike and it didn’t hurt that he was incredibly easy on the eyes—but his relationship with Gabriel had always made her…uncomfortable. To call a spade a spade, she’d always been a bit jealous of how close he was to Gabriel. She knew her jealousy made little sense. Jared might be gay, but their relationship was completely platonic; Gabriel was as straight as an arrow and he loved her. Except…
Except there was something Gabriel’s relationship with Jared had that was missing in Gabriel and hers: emotional intimacy. Gabriel might be in love with her and want her, but he never completely opened himself to her. Even when they were lying naked after making love, she could feel something separating them. Something intangible, but it was there. Gabriel didn’t like post-coital cuddling anyway; he wasn’t the touchy-feely type—well, unless it was Jared. With Jared he turned into a touchy-feely octopus and snuggled up to him at every opportunity. Rationally, she understood why Gabriel felt so at ease when Jared touched him: considering the fact that Gabe had been paralyzed for months, he had probably become used to having Jared’s hands on him every day. It was only natural that he trusted his former physiotherapist so much. It was nothing to be jealous of.
Claire looked at the empty side of the bed again and grimaced. Who was she kidding? She knew why she felt jealous of Jared. Gabriel might be in love with her, but he didn’t need her. When he was upset, Jared was the one he went to. Jared was the one he needed.
Claire’s lips twisted as she remembered the match against Arsenal last season. It had been a very important London derby and Gabriel’s team had lost thanks to the referee’s questionable decision to disallow Gabriel’s goal. To say Gabriel was angry and upset would be to say nothing. Claire tried to comfort him, but Gabriel yelled at her to leave him alone and that he didn’t want company, so Claire decided to take a walk and give him a few minutes to calm down. When she returned ten minutes later, she found Gabriel huddled into Jared’s side, his expression calm and relaxed as Jared stroked his back and whispered something into his ear. Claire stood still, feeling like an outsider watching something she could never be part of.