Total pages in book: 111
Estimated words: 104448 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 522(@200wpm)___ 418(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104448 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 522(@200wpm)___ 418(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
“I met the guys at Yale. I think you knew that. We worked on a project together that went very well.” He leaned over and ran a wet wipe over Lellie’s hands before continuing. “After college, we started a company together. A business consulting firm that specialized in taking ideas to market and finding financing.”
“Venture capital.”
“Kind of. Also like an incubator. Technically, I still own part of it, but corporate stuff wasn’t really my wheelhouse. I don’t love working at a desk in a high-rise. That was more Bash and Silas’s thing. Landry had his modeling, and Zane had his music.”
I glanced at him. “What did you have?”
“At the time, I was working with the Yale Animal Resources Center, following up on research I’d done before graduating. I was considering applying to vet school, but I didn’t want to leave the project while it was still underway. And then my brother died. And everything changed.”
I knew his brother had died in a car crash a few years ago. Katie had told me that much. I moved closer to him and took his hand in mine. “Will you tell me about it?”
He glanced back over at Lellie before finally meeting my eyes again. “It was my fault. The accident.”
My stomach dropped. “You were behind the wheel?”
“No. But I gave him the car.”
It took a minute for the words to make sense because they didn’t actually make sense at all.
“You… gave him the car? How does that make a car accident your fault?”
He closed his eyes and held his breath for a beat, pulling his hand out of mine to rub his face. “It was a fancy sports car. He was too young… too immature. He begged me for it. I should have never listened to him. He wasn’t ready for that kind of responsibility.”
“How old was he?”
“Twenty.”
I blinked. What was I missing? “Dev. He was old enough to vote. Old enough to be in the military and get deployed in a war zone. To drive tanks. And you’re blaming yourself for how he drove a car? I don’t understand.”
He ran his hands down his jean-clad thighs. “You don’t need to understand. Just know it was my fault. I blame myself, and my parents sure as hell blame me. It was enough for them to kick me out of the family and tell me they wouldn’t take a dime of my ‘tainted money.’ They turned to their religion, which would have been fine, except they ended up going to the Church of Heavenly Victory. So instead of getting comfort from their faith, they learned how to be extra hateful and intolerant. Pastor Scott apparently made it very clear to his congregation around that time that greed and covetousness were the root of all evil.”
“That’s rich,” I murmured, thinking of the sprawling mansion Katie’s parents lived in with their retinue of servants to support it.
“Agreed. They thought I’d gone to the evil Northeast and been turned into someone they no longer recognized. An ‘Ivy Elite,’ even though I was literally working for free while wading knee-deep in horse shit every day. They figured I’d gotten my money gambling with rich kids, and nothing I said could make them change their minds. It took me a long time and a ton of therapy to realize it was easier for them to blame me than themselves or, god forbid, my brother, Matt.”
“So, did the therapist help you come to terms with the fact his death wasn’t your fault?”
I already knew the answer based on the way he spoke about it.
“Not really. He tried, but I figured he didn’t have the whole story.” He surprised me by smiling. “Don’t worry, I can hear how that sounds now that I’m saying it out loud.”
“Good.”
“I’ve spent a long time blaming myself,” he admitted.
“Sounds like it.”
He reached for my hand and held it between both of his. “It was why I didn’t want to know about Katie’s baby.”
It made a strange kind of sense. He was obviously fearful of getting close to a new family member and possibly losing them, too.
He took a breath. “But in avoiding it, I lost out on more time with Katie. I lost out on seeing her as a mom and meeting Lellie earlier. I missed things that would have enriched my life… made it immeasurably better.”
I nodded, suddenly feeling the sting of his regret in my own eyes.
“Life’s too short, Tully,” he said softly. “I don’t want to miss any more of it.”
I pulled my hand out of his so I could put my arm around his shoulders and pull him in tight to my side on the lush leather sofa. Lellie had fallen asleep with her mouth and hands coated in sticky strawberry juice.
As the sleek jet continued to rocket us toward the challenges that awaited us in Dallas, I considered how I’d felt the day I’d left Dallas with Lellie in tow.