Total pages in book: 46
Estimated words: 45966 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 230(@200wpm)___ 184(@250wpm)___ 153(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 45966 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 230(@200wpm)___ 184(@250wpm)___ 153(@300wpm)
He shook his head with disappointment spreading all over his face like a blazing wildfire. An expression you’d think I’d be used to by now.
Nothing I did was ever good enough. His high expectations made it nearly impossible to please him. Everything, and I mean everything, in life was black and white for him.
I was the only gray area in his world of right or wrong.
“How many times do I have to tell you I want to open my own business after I graduate in a month?”
“It’s not going to happen.”
“Why are you so against me having my own life?”
“Because I’m handing you one where you’ll immediately be successful! Why would you want to work from the ground up if you don’t have to? This is your legacy! Why can’t you just see that? You refuse to let me help you!”
“That isn’t saving me! That’s you not believing in me and what I’m capable of without your help!”
“Son,” Grandma intervened, saving my ass.
She did this often, having to come between her son and grandson.
Two of the men she loved more than anything constantly butted heads. It never mattered how much trouble I got in. She always loved me wholeheartedly. She was patient with me. Something my father clearly didn’t have when it came to me.
I didn’t wanna continue arguing with my father, not with my grandmother there. More often than not, she took my side, reminding him I was born with my own personality and didn’t have to be obsessed with Christmas.
My mind was wired differently.
“You need to calm down.”
“Mom,” Dad stressed in a sharp tone. “Calm down? Calm down?! He knows where his place is, and that’s in Mistletoe Town! Why would you want to struggle?”
My stomach somersaulted. My emotions were running so high. I couldn’t keep having the same fight with him over and over again. Not only was it not healthy, but I was beyond over it.
“This is the only way I know how to be!”
“Look at you! Just look at you, Nicholas! You’re a Saint Clair! Don’t you understand that? You think I’m trying to punish you, but don’t for one second think I didn’t do that for you! I will not stand by while you ruin your life! I’m your father! You’re my son! My job is to protect you! No matter what!”
“Protect me? From what exactly, huh? Living my own life? My own dreams?”
“Nicholas, please…” Grandma pleaded, standing in front of me with tears in her eyes. “Don’t do this. I’m begging you, please don’t do this.”
“Do what? Tell the truth?”
He growled, loud and clear.
“All you’ve ever done is kill my dreams! You don’t want a son; you want a puppet!”
He scoffed out a breath, shaking his head.
“He loves you. You’re the most important thing to him in the world.”
“He has a horrible way of showing it.”
“He’s just trying to do what’s best for you. It’s a tough place for any parent to be in.”
“No,” I sternly replied. “I just wanna live my life. I don’t care about the consequences.”
“All I’ve ever done,” my father insisted, “is try to help you make the right decisions. Be someone who shows you the way, but it was never good enough. It’s never been good enough for you. You’ve resisted me at every turn, at every step! You have no idea the things I’ve done to support and help you because you refuse to see them.”
“You know what?”
“What?”
“I don’t have to deal with this anymore. If you refuse to let me open my own building business in Mistletoe Town, then I’ll just leave.”
“Nicholas!” Grandma scolded. “Take that back! You don’t mean that! Tell him you don’t mean that!”
“I’ve always known he’s wanted me to be someone I’m not. He wanted me to be born different since day one. The truth is he hates who I am, and we both know it!”
“That’s not true. Your father loves you. He loves you more than anything in this world.”
“Yeah? Well, like I said—he has a horrible way of showing it.”
“I expressed it to you the only way I knew how!”
“It’s not your choice to make. I’ve worked to give you everything you’ve wanted. Be the perfect son, but I won’t give in to this!”
“You couldn’t be more wrong. I may not have been the father you think I should have been or should be, but I know when you took your first step, when you lost your first tooth, and when you got your first haircut! I know about every skinned knee, every bruise, every broken bone, every runny nose, every milestone in your life. Why? Because I was there.
“That’s not what’s important right now! You totally missed the point. Why am I not surprised? None of that matters to me, but the one thing that does, you couldn’t care about. You have the bar set so high for what you think I should be, there’s no way I could ever reach it. It’s not the same for Felix or Holly like it is for me.”