Total pages in book: 140
Estimated words: 132649 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 663(@200wpm)___ 531(@250wpm)___ 442(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 132649 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 663(@200wpm)___ 531(@250wpm)___ 442(@300wpm)
Iris’s eyes memorized each beautiful feature individually, lovingly brushing over the hills and valleys of that gorgeous face. Her gaze snagged on the scar. This man. This beautiful, terrified man, who was still here hiding from his ghosts, afraid to face his future. He wasn’t even aware of what he was asking of her, what he was asking of himself, and if they were ever going to stand a chance Iris had to make him understand.
“I love you, Trystan, and I want you to come away with me.”
His breath stuttered in his lungs and halted completely. His hand crept up to the center of his chest and absently rubbed at the spot just above his heart.
“You’re hiding, Trystan,” she whispered. “You’re still hiding from the ghost of who you were. And you’re asking me to hide with you. I do want to be with you, but I refuse to hide here—or anywhere else—with you. If you want a life with me then you’ve got to be prepared to live it with me. You’ve got to forgive yourself for Trish Nesbitt. You have to fix your life and your career. And I don’t mean by becoming a carpenter, or whatever the hell else. That’s not who you are. Telling me to be brave, while you’re using me as an excuse to live a life of obscurity because you’re afraid to face your demons, is just the height of hypocrisy.
“You told my parents you have to find a way to create a safe space in your life for me. But you can’t do that while you’re hiding in places like this. It’s amazing here, it’s beautiful, private, and it feels like we’re the only two people left on the face of the earth, but it’s not home. And if we’re going to be together, we need to figure out where home will be. Because it’s not here, or any place similar to here. For us to truly know if we’ll work, we can’t be the only people on earth. We need to be out there, in the real world. Where everybody thinks they own a part of you.
“It’ll test us, but it’ll also make us stronger and if we survive all the tough times ahead, we’ll know that we’re made for each other. I do want to fight for us. But the fight is out there. Not here.”
She pushed herself up from the table and gave him a bittersweet smile.
“So no, I won’t stay with you, Trystan. But I do hope you’ll come with me.”
She didn’t give him a chance to reply, knowing he would need time to ruminate over her words, and she turned on her heel to walk out of the room.
Iris was pretty busy for the rest of the day. She booked a flight home in two days’ time and made a reservation at a hotel in George, close to the airport, for the next night. She also called the rental company about a new car and arranged for a taxi to pick her up and take her to the rental shop in town. She sent her parents and flatmates the news that she’d be home soon. She didn’t see Trystan at all. She’d missed the walk with him and Luna and felt a pang of loss at the thought of this possibly having been her last opportunity to walk with them. She blinked back tears at the thought, and refocused on packing her bags. She had so much crap scattered all over the house.
She and Trystan had been sharing a room since the first night they’d made love and that’s where most of her stuff was. After she packed her bags, she moved them to the guest room that she hadn’t occupied in nearly ten days. Something told her she’d be sleeping there tonight.
Trystan remained elusive, but Luna started following her around, as if sensing that she was going somewhere. In the end, Iris simply curled up on the sofa in the solarium while Luna rested her heavy head on Iris’s lap.
She stroked the dog’s big, shaggy head, crying silently as she did so.
“I’m going to miss you so much, girl. You’ve been the best, goodest girl. Take care of your dad for me when I’m gone, okay? Keep him out of the sads. That’s your job, okay?”
She wrapped her arms around the dog’s neck and hugged her close, taking comfort in her solid strength and lovely doggy smell.
Eventually Iris got hungry and padded toward the kitchen, hoping to find him there, ready for dinner. But the kitchen was empty and cold. Iris made herself a quick sandwich and ate it standing at the counter.
It was nearly nine when she walked toward his bedroom door. It was closed and there was no light shining from beneath it. Iris exhaled on a shuddering sigh and with slumped shoulders walked toward her own room.