Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 100859 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100859 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
Her hazel eyes skirt over my face, searching. “What kind of ritual?”
I almost tell her the truth.
He wants to contact a dead woman. A dead teacher who drowned in the lake.
And though Crane never told me not to mention it to my mother, I fear I must be cautious.
“He wants to learn how to fly,” I say.
“Fly?” She barks out a laugh. “Gods, that is a lofty goal. He obviously has the wrong idea about witches.”
“He says I’m powerful and can help. I think he’s lonely too,” I add in there. That wasn’t a lie. I do sense a loneliness in Crane, something he might not see himself. He’s not the man to ever admit it, but I am lonely too. I know what it looks like to feel like you’ve been set adrift.
She pins me with her gaze. “Are you intimate with him?”
I cough in surprise. “With my professor? No!”
“Do you want to be?”
I stare at her for a moment. My cheeks have certainly been going red a lot lately. I look away at the fire. “Mother…”
“No, it’s the right question. If Brom was still here, you’d be married with a child by now, I’m sure of it.”
The sound of his name makes me close my eyes. For once, I don’t want to hear it.
“It’s alright to have appetites, Katrina,” my mother whispers, leaning closer. “For a witch, it’s to be expected. Sex is an exchange of power. Of energy. Of magic. I want you to be free to explore whatever you want with whomever you want. You are of the age, my dear child, when you should be doing these things. Even if it happens to be with your professor.”
I open my eyes and shift in my chair uncomfortably. “The professor and I are just friends.”
“But you are a beautiful, vibrant young witch, and he is a strong, powerful young man.”
“How do you know these things?” I say, glancing at her in suspicion. “You said you’d never heard of him.”
“If he weren’t those things, would you be doing a midnight ritual with him?” she asks simply. “I think not.” She sucks on her lip for a moment in thought. “Just remember the tea.”
I frown. “Tea?”
“The tea I made you drink last year. When you were having sex with that farmhand. Joshua Meeks.”
I gasp, my hand at my chest, my whole body flushing. “You knew about that?”
She laughs softly. “I am no idiot, Katrina. I knew. I knew. I was happy for you.”
Good heavens. I don’t like where this conversation is going.
“What about the tea?” I ask, remembering now how she used to make so much tea during that time, though she never did say what was in it.
“Just ask me for it, and I will make it. You can’t get pregnant that way.”
My body tenses like I’ve been slapped. I hadn’t wanted to get pregnant. After Brom left, I never really thought about it, about starting a family. But the idea that she was giving me a magic tea to ensure I wouldn’t get pregnant was…
“It was for the best,” she says in a forceful voice. “Don’t you agree?”
She’s right. She’s absolutely right. But I should have been able to make that choice for myself.
“So,” she goes on. “Are you mad at me over this now, or did you want to ask permission to stay out late with your professor? If it’s the latter, the answer is yes.”
And if it’s the former? I think. Still, I’m surprised she’s saying yes to this.
“What about Mathias?” I ask. “He can’t go so late. Besides, I don’t think Mathias needs to escort me to school anymore. And if you’re so concerned, Professor can ride back with me.”
“The professor shouldn’t leave the grounds,” my mother says. “But you’re right.”
“I am?” I look at her in surprise.
“Yes.” She folds her hands on her lap, grasping them as if to keep them from shaking. “I’ll relieve Mathias of his duties. You must carry a torch with you, but I think you’ll be safe on your own now.” She stares down at her hands for a moment. “I no longer fear you running off.”
I stare at her for a moment, not sure that I heard her right. “You thought I was going to run away? That’s why you had Mathias escort me?”
She avoids my eyes. “I was too afraid of losing you, Katrina, and I know you didn’t want to go to the school. I could sense your soul being pulled to other places, sense your dreams. You wanted to escape. I couldn’t afford to let that happen.”
I blink. That is a lot to take in. “You know I could have escaped at any other time. The only thing holding me back was you.” I reach out and take her hand. It’s so cold, her skin feeling like wax. “I didn’t want to leave you, and I won’t. And if you want me to stop going to school and stay here with you, I will.”