Total pages in book: 141
Estimated words: 135604 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 678(@200wpm)___ 542(@250wpm)___ 452(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 135604 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 678(@200wpm)___ 542(@250wpm)___ 452(@300wpm)
I grinned, unable to help it. “You fuckin’ love me, girl. Look at you,” I murmured, wiping my thumb across her cheek.
Tori blinked and allowed her lips to curl, then she let go of my face, twisted her upper body, grabbed her silverware, forked three squares of pancakes, and shoved them into her mouth, mumbling two words around her bite.
“So much.”
Chapter Nineteen
TORI
Three days later
You win yet?
I sent my message, then glanced up at Nate’s office door. It was still closed, so I looked down again, keeping focus on my phone while I stood behind the bar at Whitecaps.
I had been on it all morning, more than I’d ever been on my phone before while working a shift. Just reading and sending texts, not talking, but still. It was unprofessional. I knew that. I knew it before Nate caught me and then caught me again the two times he’d stepped out of his office today.
He didn’t say anything, just gave me a look indicating the level of unprofessionalism I was hitting. I read it loud and clear, tucked my phone away, and got back to work.
Then my pocket vibrated again and I was reading and smiling and typing, doing this while keeping an eye out just in case Nate needed a third refill on his black coffee.
I couldn’t help the sneakiness and the risking I was doing. Really …
Okay, that wasn’t exactly true. I could help it. This could absolutely be helped. I just didn’t want to. I wanted other things more.
I wanted to talk to Jamie. I wanted to be there with him on the flight to Florida he took yesterday morning. I wanted to be with him in his hotel room and do hotel room things, like have sex in the bed and in the bathroom, and if there was a desk, I wanted to be bent over it or have my butt hanging off the edge and my legs spread wide, because that’s what you did when you shared a hotel room with someone you were seeing. You had vacation sex, and I wanted vacation sex with Jamie.
Our everyday sex was phenomenal so I knew vacation sex with him had to be out of this world amazing. I was really wanting to experience that.
More importantly, though, over everything, over holding hands on flights and neighbors in the next room complaining about the noise level and middle-of-the-night wall banging, I wanted to stand on that Florida beach and watch my man take first place in his meet today.
I wanted it badly. So, so badly. It was killing me not being there.
But there was nothing I could do about it. I couldn’t do those things. Any of them. At least not this time. I had to work a job that never really felt like a job to me, until today and a little yesterday when I was thinking about Jamie alone in his hotel room. But now, right now, it was really feeling like a job and one I no longer wanted.
Ridiculous. I loved working here. I always did.
But today and yesterday and maybe for months, I loved Jamie, too. I loved him.
Name doodling and spare house keys and can this be our thing kind of love, which was why I was being unprofessional and staying on my phone as much as I was doing. I was excited for him and sad that I wasn’t there and I loved him.
I loved him. I loved him. I loved him.
And I was certain he knew it, too.
I hadn’t said it yet. Not really. Not so that Jamie could hear. I said so much and nodded and moaned yes yes yes when I was coming and he was in my ear, growling you fuckin’ love me, girl, but I never said it. That was our game. I wouldn’t say it then. If I did, we wouldn’t have that anymore, and I wasn’t ready to give that up. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be.
I loved our game almost as much as I loved Jamie.
Maybe I would say it when he got back from Florida. Maybe I would say it a month from now or in the next message I typed. I didn’t know. I was waiting for it to happen as much he was.
Love was an adventure. It should be spontaneous and irresponsible and a little crazy. Not planned for. Not overthought. I had no idea when I was going to say those words to Jamie, and I liked not knowing.
I wanted impulsive I love you’s and reckless desires. I wanted this how it always was between us—uncontrollable. Overwhelming. And never, ever contained.
The phone vibrated in my hand as a new text appeared on the screen. I smiled reading it.
Hasn’t started yet. All these assholes got their girls here to watch them lose. Sucks for them.