Total pages in book: 67
Estimated words: 64767 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 324(@200wpm)___ 259(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 64767 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 324(@200wpm)___ 259(@250wpm)___ 216(@300wpm)
“How is he?” Lucy says as I sit in front of her. She asked me to come to visit her, and I have turned down every single one of her requests. That is until today.
“He’s healthy and happy,” I reply, referring to her son. “He has incredible parents.”
She sits on her legs, bites her nails, and looks behind her. The doctors are out there, and we are in an open room where other guests and patients are also located.
“Did you tell Thea I want to see her?” She doesn’t remove her fingers away from her mouth so she murmurs the words.
“Yes. She isn’t ready.”
Lucy looks down. “I’m doing better, I swear.”
“It’s only been a few months, Lucy. It takes time.”
It turns out Lucy is bipolar, amongst other things. She is on medication to help and attending lots of guidance sessions and cognitive therapy groups to help guide her through her diagnosis. I can see an improvement already, but I don’t understand why I’m here. If she’s changed, she must know by now I don’t want her.
It’s been hard to get this fact through to Lucy. Not once have I ever given her the impression I want her.
“Can you tell Thea I’m sorry? She is a little broken too, you know?” she whispers. “I was blind to it all growing up, but Thea saw it all. Knew it all. And she protected me from it, even though I didn’t realize.” Lucy takes a deep breath then looks down at her red and inflamed nails that are bitten right back to the quick. “Our father used to beat our mother. Thea was the only one who could calm him down. Never me, even though I was his favorite, and my mother used Thea for that. She would feed him alcohol because he asked. The woman never said no. Then, when he went off the deep end, she would wake Thea in the middle of the night to calm him down.” She takes another deep breath. “I tried once, and he hit me… slapped me so hard across the face that I flew across the room. It’s what started my jealousy because I was supposed to be Daddy’s girl, not her.” Lucy looks up at me now. Her dark hair has lost its vibrant shine, and her eyes appear tired and lackluster. “Only Thea could calm him,” she finishes.
“I’m glad to see you doing better, Lucy.”
She offers me a shy smile and nods her head. “You love her, don’t you?”
“This isn’t a conversation I want to have with you.”
“The fact that you won’t say no, proves you do.” Lucy reaches up and pulls a piece of her hair then places it in her mouth.
“It proves nothing,” I tell her.
“I need to see her, now my head’s a little clearer,” Lucy says, pulling the hair out of her mouth and twirling it around her fingers.
“You will have to wait until she’s ready. She can’t be forced into seeing you, Lucy, especially if she doesn’t want to.”
“Will you bring her when she’s ready?”
“No, Lucy, this will be my last and only visit. I came out of respect for my cousin, and now I must leave. I hope you get better, Lucy. I hope you see your worth, and your sister’s because you have a strong family member in her, and that’s not something you should take for granted.”
“Ask her to dance with you, and then twirl. Daddy always used to play the old songs and twirl her. Thea loves to twirl. It was the only time I really remember her laughing and smiling.”
I stand, pushing away from the chair. “Goodbye, Lucy.”
“Goodbye, Atlas,” she says in a small voice.
I walk out, and when I do, I feel better, for her as well as Theadora.
Maybe one day she will be the sister Theadora needs.
“Theadora asked for your number,” are the first words Sydney says to me the following week. I fired her months ago, but she never listened and still turns up at work every day.
“She has my number,” I tell her.
Sydney’s hands go to her hips. “That was until a fuckhead wrecked her phone…” She pauses. “So, should I give it to her, or not? I have a feeling she knows it, but wants permission from you for me to give it to her.”
“No.”
Sydney nods, not arguing with me as she walks out of the room, shutting the door behind her.
I spent the day putting out fires, in business meetings and whatever else cropped up. Grabbing my keys, I check my watch. It’s late, and soon the casino’s busiest time will commence as people finish work for the day and come here to spend all their money.
Sydney’s gone by the time I leave. Lately, she walks out at exactly the same time every day, and she avoids me when she can.