Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 100750 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100750 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
She opened her bedroom door. More voices. More unfamiliar sounds.
“Rafe?” she called out as she inched her way down the hall toward the noise. “Rafe?”
Nadia crept down the stairs and into the catchall room. Rafe sat at their shared desk with his head bent. “Rafe?”
He looked up with the blackest eyes possible. She took a step back. “Rafe?”
He stood and came toward her. Arms outstretched, waiting for her.
Her heart thumped wildly in her chest. A voice told her to run, and to run fast. But she couldn’t make her legs move.
“Rafe?” she said, her voice quivering. He stopped and turned. The side of his head was caved in, and she could see into the depths of his skull. His neck contorted in angles it shouldn’t. Bugs, snakes, and worms crawled out.
Nadia screamed.
“Wake up, Nadia.”
She felt pressure on her shoulders and fought whoever tried to hold her down.
“Nadia, wake up!”
Her eyes darted open at the sound of her father’s voice. He hovered over her, fear etched across his face. An instant wave of emotion took over, and realization weighed heavily on her as her senses returned. The dream hadn’t been a nightmare but her reality. She sobbed as her father pulled her to his chest.
“It’s okay. I got you,” he said as his hand moved up and down her back. The side of the bed dipped where Rafe should’ve been, and she smelled the familiar scent of strawberries-and-cream shampoo. Small arms wrapped around her midsection, and her body sighed, almost as if it needed her children.
Nadia let go of her father and brought her babies to her, holding and caressing them as best she could. Gemma was tall for her age, but not Lynnea. Not the baby of the family. She curled into her mother’s side, stuck her thumb in her mouth, and wept quietly. Gemma maneuvered her body so she was on the other side of her sister and rested her head on her mom’s chest. She, too, cried.
When Nadia woke again, she had no awareness of the time or even the day. For all she knew it had been weeks since her world had been upended. When she glanced at the TV, she was reminded abruptly that days had passed.
Over a sleeping Lynnea, Nadia reached for the remote and shut the television off. She vaguely remembered turning it on hours ago and falling asleep to Rudy, Rafe’s favorite movie, with her girls snuggled next to her.
Nadia looked at Lynnea, with her thumb in her mouth. A habit they’d broken when she was three. Nadia left her thumb there and would deal with it later. She turned to Gemma, who stared back at her with the same soulful brown eyes as hers.
“Hi,” she said quietly so as to not wake Lynnea.
“Hi,” Gemma replied. “I don’t want to go to school today.” Tears pooled in her eyes.
“You don’t have to,” Nadia told her. “You can stay home for the rest of the week.”
Gemma nodded slightly. Nadia kissed her forehead. If she had her choice, her girls wouldn’t ever leave her sight.
“And Lynnea.”
Nadia shook her head. “Nope. And me neither.” She didn’t want to return to work. In her mind, it would be one thing if her husband had passed away, but to be killed while saving another woman during an annual road race all because someone’s brakes had failed—someone who shouldn’t have been driving down the road to begin with—put Nadia’s situation front and center. Everyone knew how Rafe had died. It’d been on the news and continued to air while an investigation took place. The news channels interviewed people who’d been there, reminding Nadia repeatedly that people had witnessed her husband dying.
“Does Daddy get a funeral?” It was after they had returned home from the hospital that Nadia explained to the girls what the doctors were doing to Rafe. Lynnea didn’t like it, and Gemma said she was proud of her dad and how he was going to save someone’s life. Those words only sparked Lynnea’s outburst as she questioned why someone couldn’t save her daddy’s life. Nadia had the same thoughts.
“Yeah, he does.”
“Do I have to go?”
Nadia pondered her question and nodded. “If you don’t go, you might regret it later, and it’s not something you can change.”
“But I don’t want to see Daddy in the coffin.”
“I understand. You can sit in the pew, next to me. You don’t have to see him if you don’t want to.”
“Okay.” Her voice was small, nothing like the outgoing child she was a few days ago. Nadia pictured her and Rafe, dancing in the kitchen, and him telling her to put her feet on top of his. He’d twirled her around like a princess.
“I’m so sorry, Gemma,” Nadia found herself saying. “I know I’m hurting, but I can’t even imagine how you and Lynnea feel.”