Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
But he and Sienna seemed to be walking on eggshells around each other as well, so I could only conclude that something had happened between them. An argument about Brad? A decision that affected their family life? Bills?
I wanted to ask Kerry during the milking that morning, then later when Sienna and I were putting the last touches on the silo, but ultimately, I decided it wasn’t my place.
Sienna did seem to be studying me more closely as we unloaded products from the boxes, and then again while I was touching up some paint on the door, but I also might’ve been hypersensitive to, well, everything. It was my last day on the farm, each interaction seemed a bit weightier, and I wasn’t sure if I could handle additional pressure to my already heavy heart.
The worst was my final visit with Mercy in the stables. I tried not to get emotional as I offered him my last sugar cube in his stall. Thankfully I was alone, so if I did end up blubbering, it would most likely go unnoticed. Though probably not to Kerry. He seemed innately attuned to everything when it came to me.
“Thanks for helping me see myself through your eyes.” I rubbed Mercy’s neck, my voice thick with sentiment. “And for helping me wade through some of the dark stuff inside me.” My voice cracked, but I quickly composed myself, not wanting to startle him. “Not sure I could’ve done it without you.” Without someone else on this farm either. I smooched his nose. “Hope I helped you some too.”
As I left the stables and made my way to dinner, I glanced over the farmland, seeing it through new eyes. Everything would change as soon as I stepped on that plane. Gone would be the rolling hills and pretty mountain views, to be replaced by crowded sidewalks and glittering lights. No more smelly cows, funny pigs, or cute goats.
Majestic horses and beautiful cowboys.
God, I’d miss this damned place. Or maybe I was being melodramatic. I thought I’d miss the desert too. Or rather the people in it. And that was really what it came down to, wasn’t it? The connections you made to people or places or things.
I’d get over the ache of another loss and learn to appreciate the experience just like with other things. Still, I was trading the quiet outdoors for blaring horns and a life I didn’t have my feet firmly rooted in. But I’d get there eventually, and being here had helped me see everything more clearly.
When I walked inside, everyone was waiting for me at the dinner table. Marta had made a farewell dinner of her famous chili, with extra cornbread to take on my flight, and it was almost too much.
George raised his glass in the middle of it all, made a nice toast, and complimented my work at the silo. “Come back and see us again soon.”
“I will.” I clinked everyone’s glass. When I got to Kerry and our eyes met, his softened briefly, and it nearly gutted me.
Afterward, we all retreated to the porch for some lemonade and Marta’s amazing melt-in-your-mouth apple pie, and we discussed my early morning flight and Sienna driving me to the airport.
“Seems like ages ago that I picked you up this summer.”
“Right?” I almost wanted to insist Kerry drive me instead, but it was probably best that he didn’t. I didn’t think I could muster the strength to get out of the truck if he was sitting beside me, and maybe he was having the same thought because he didn’t offer or object to the plan and neither did anyone else.
Ainsley gave me a hug along with a parting gift. A word-search puzzle book for the plane, she said, and that along with Marta’s thoughtfulness and the heaviness in the air left me feeling pretty raw. Until Kerry quietly left the porch, then came back with a medium-sized package wrapped in brown butcher paper.
I felt on display as he handed it to me, most notably to Sienna.
“Open it when you get home,” he said casually, but his fingers were trembling, so I knew he was only trying to seem nonchalant. When Ainsley tried to guess the gift, Kerry swept her up in his arms, tickled her gently, then told her it was time for bed.
As they abruptly said their good-nights and I watched him carry her through the doorway, I was glad for the reprieve from all the scrutiny as well as not having a dragged-out, formal goodbye in front of everyone else.
Besides, the gift would be enough. Whatever it was.
But I did hug Marta and George goodbye and told Sienna I’d see her in the morning before booking it down to my room, afraid I was going to lose it in front of them.