Total pages in book: 115
Estimated words: 107763 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 539(@200wpm)___ 431(@250wpm)___ 359(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 107763 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 539(@200wpm)___ 431(@250wpm)___ 359(@300wpm)
“And yet I see you, and not an army,” I said, though the truth was, I missed my brother too. We could never be close because of our father. But even when Father insulted and berated him, he never took it out on me. He never hated me.
“I missed you, August,” she said and I frowned.
“Mother, please do not—”
“This is the only time you shall hear an apology from me. Do not interrupt me.”
An apology? I did not believe it could happen. “Go on.”
“I was cold to you and your brother because your father liked to break things I cared about or use them against me. I did it for so long that I did not know how to stop. He stole everything from me…even the love of my children. The day you stood up to him, I was so grateful—and so scared he’d punish you worse. So, I banished you, hoping to keep as much distance between you both as possible. It was my small way of protecting you, too. Do you know he never struck me again after that?”
“I did not know that.” I hung my head.
“I think he feared you. No one had made him feel so small and weak before.” She laughed. “He was sure I was hiding you somewhere close. He’d question me as to your whereabouts, and I’d pretend not to know or care. I worried he’d search for you himself, but he never did. I didn’t know why, until the day he was shot. When he realized he was dying, he whispered into my ear, Stop calling him August; Wilhelm is a good name, he’ll use it better than I did. He’s a good boy, that Wilhelm. Those were his last words. You were his last thought. I’m not sure it brings much comfort, all things considered.”
My throat ached.
“Mother, it’s late and I wish to—”
“I am sorry, Wilhelm,” she said. My lips cracked to the side. Covering my mouth with my hand, I took a deep breath. “I am so sorry that such a good boy as you ended up with such bad parents as us. I pray you do much better.”
I hung my head as my eyes stung. What was the matter with me? Tears? At my age? Fuck.
“This proposition…do I have to go back permanently?”
“I would like that, but I doubt you will. So instead, I ask that you help your brother settle, and assure the government you are always ready to be called if needed.”
“Hathor—”
“You will have to marry her before you leave.”
“What? Did you not say you wished to leave in three days—now two?”
“Yes. However, it is not safe to be traveling in a large party, so she will have to remain here. And truthfully, I fear she will be a distraction. But I doubt either of you would like to wait until after you return to England. Your aunt will have you married secretly and quietly, since we are supposed to be in mourning. It will be done today. Will you be able to convince her?”
“Mother, she is a lady. She would want a grand wedding with—”
“Talk to her first. Convince her, if you need to. But we must hurry,” was all she said before leaving.
* * *
—
I was sure that if I slept, I would wake up thinking it had all been a dream. So I did not sleep again. I sat up and waited…anxiously, for the first time.
It did not feel like it was such a long time. She came first thing in the morning. I knew it was her, because only she would think to knock.
“Enter.”
The first thing she did was look around the corner for my mother.
I smirked. “She’s not here.”
“Thank goodness. I do not believe I am ready for another sparring session,” she replied as she rushed over to me, nearly jumping onto the bed beside me. “Good morning, how are you? Did you sleep well?”
“Sort of. What about you? Did you sleep well?” I reached for her hand, and when she gave it, I kissed the back of it.
“Sort of,” she mused back, and I was not sure what expression was on my face, but she seemed to perceive that something was amiss. Her tone became much more serious. “What is wrong?”
Again, I kissed her hand, this time on the inside of her palm. “Will you marry me?”
“Have I not already answered this question?”
“You have. But I am wondering if you will marry me today.”
“What?”
“I must go tomorrow, with my mother. I will be back, I swear it. I would not dare leave you if it were not so important. There is much that needs to be done, and I cannot yet bring you with me—”
“All right.”
I paused, confused. “What? All right?”
“Yes, all right, I shall marry you.”
“Just like that?”
She giggled and nodded. “Again, I have already said yes before, so it is not hard to decide.”