Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 82255 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82255 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 411(@200wpm)___ 329(@250wpm)___ 274(@300wpm)
“Are you serious?” A knot forms in my throat. “She can really do that?”
Sybil shrugs. “I’m just saying it’s happened before. I don’t know what will happen this time, but he really stuck his neck on the chopping block today.”
Clothes forgotten, I flop down onto my bed and worry my lip between my teeth. Up until now, Louisa has just been a thorn in my side. But it’s an entirely different matter if she’s messing with Sebastian.
“What can I do?” I ask Sybil. “She’s not going to stop.”
“Honestly, I have no idea.” She shakes her head. “You could fight fire with fire, but that means stooping to her level.”
“I don’t have time for that.” As it stands, my schedule is already overwhelming enough. And I don’t want to resort to immature antics to deal with Louisa.
“I know.” Sybil offers me an apologetic smile. “In the meantime, I think you just need to be cautious. The last thing you want to do is give her more ammunition. So, be careful if you’re sneaking around with a certain teacher. She would call you both out so fast your head would spin.”
My chest squeezes as I imagine the possible fallout. “You’re right. We need to be careful.”
BETWEEN DEALING with the public shame of my father’s crime and Sebastian’s constant mood swings, I’m exhausted. I spent the entirety of the day deflecting questions about my family from other students and trying to keep my head down. The headmistress even took it upon herself to address me privately, asking if I was okay.
I told her that I am, but that really isn’t true. I’m hanging on by a thread and pretending that I’m not is harder than I thought it would be. Despite what my dad has done, I miss him. And even though my mother told me she wouldn’t be around, it still hurts that I haven’t heard a single thing from her. The only silver lining is that my phone was officially disconnected today, so at least I can’t readily search out the news articles.
My entire future is up in the air, and it’s all so overwhelming. Right now, I’m supposed to be planning for college and what I’m going to do once I no longer have the safety of Loyola to fall back on. But how can I do that if I’m barely managing to handle the current circumstances?
I curl up in my bed and try to sleep, but it doesn’t come. I have this horrifying notion that Louisa will come crashing through my door at any moment like the Kool-Aid man and try to ruin what little sanity I have left. But when my door opens tonight, it isn’t Louisa standing there. It’s my other tormentor. The one I can’t seem to make sense of no matter how hard I try. And stupidly, I take comfort in the fact that he’s here. I feel slightly less crazy whenever he proves that he’s thinking of me too.
“Hi,” I murmur, though all I really want to do is blurt out a million questions. What is he doing here? Is he going to use me and leave again? Because tonight, I really can’t handle it. I will break for real, and I’m so terrified he doesn’t care.
“Shh.” He closes the door behind him and slips off his coat, and then his shoes. It’s an unexpected move, and I watch him in nervous anticipation to see what he will do next. I have no idea what to think when he slips into the tiny bed beside me.
“What are you doing here?” I whisper, too afraid to move for fear he might disappear like some figment of my imagination.
His response is to stroke my hair and kiss my forehead. A gesture I wouldn’t even believe Sebastian Carter was capable of if I hadn’t witnessed it myself. He pulls me against him and wraps his arm around me.
“I’m here, Stella. Just go to sleep now.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
SEBASTIAN
AS THE NEXT week comes and goes, I harness my self-control and do my best to avoid Stella. After spending the night in her room and leaving her asleep the next day, we have not exchanged a single word. She comes to class, and I dutifully ignore her while Louisa and her minions shoot daggers into the back of my head.
The headmistress called me into her office to discuss the situation, as I knew she would. She made a point to say that perhaps I was too hard on Louisa, but what she really meant was she didn’t want to lose her father’s funding for the school year. I contended that Louisa is a senior, and the money will dry up eventually, regardless. After that blunt statement, I was dismissed without further argument.
In an attempt to take the edge off my frustrations, I’ve been logging extra time at soccer practice and taking longer runs than I typically would. If I’m not fucking my pent-up energy into Stella, I need to find other ways to manage it. And right now, she needs to come to terms with her family situation. But when the weekend comes and I discover she isn’t on campus, her casual disappearance sends me over the edge.