Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 76205 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 381(@200wpm)___ 305(@250wpm)___ 254(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 76205 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 381(@200wpm)___ 305(@250wpm)___ 254(@300wpm)
Count to ten, Jesse. Fucking count to ten.
“It was tough at first,” he continues, his voice cracking. “Like I thought I was dreaming, and I wasn’t sure what was real, but now I’m sure.” Another pause. “I lied to you, Jesse. Those women didn’t drug me. I took the stuff.”
Anger curls through me, at myself and at Dragon. Fucking Dragon…
Count to ten, Jesse. Count to—
“I trusted you, man!” I yell into the phone.
Silence again, until—
“I know you did. I swear to God, I will make this up to you. But you guys are better off without me on this tour. I’m going to get clean, man. Totally. So clean that I’ll never be tempted again.”
Count to fucking ten, Jesse!
One…
Two…
Three…
“You going to say anything, Jess? Or are you so pissed you can’t speak?”
Fuck, he has no idea.
“Dragon,” I say, taking care to regulate my voice despite my anger. “You’re an addict, man. You’re always going to be tempted.”
“Yeah. But I think I can get a handle on it. I thought I had a handle on it. But I—”
Rage surges through me. Fuck counting to ten. “I can’t believe you, Dragon! This was our big shot. You almost blew it for us. And now I’m going to have to see if I can get Derek to sub in for you for the entire tour. He’s a great drummer, but he’s kind of an asshole. Totally rubs me the wrong way. Plus, how does that make us look with Emerald Phoenix? We look like fucking amateurs.”
I’m not exactly being fair. A lot of professionals have drug problems.
And the money to support them.
But I don’t give a rat’s ass about any of that in this moment. I trusted him. I trusted Dragon. He told me he was drugged, and I believed him. I didn’t even hesitate because I trusted him beyond all else. After everything we’ve been through together. After everything he’s been through. How could he?
The stories he’s told me flash through my mind. He’s had a tough life. Tougher than I can even think about.
But this tour means everything to all of us. Not just me, but Cage, Jake, and Rory. For my fucking family.
“For God’s sake, Dragon, we named the fucking band after you.”
“Jesse, I’m not leaving the band. I just need to do this. For myself. And for you guys. But I’d sure understand if you kick me out. Hell, I’d probably kick me out if I were you.”
“Dragon, damn it—”
“It’s me, Jess.” My sister’s voice.
“Callie, put him back on.”
“This is why he didn’t want to talk to you. He knew you wouldn’t take it well. But Donny and I have talked to his doctors, and we agree with Dragon that this is what’s best.”
“You and Donny don’t have a clue what’s at stake here.”
My sister huffs. “You don’t think I know what’s at stake here? I’m your sister, Jesse. I’ve watched you work your ass off to make a go at this band, and I understand that this is your big chance. But you have another drummer, and you said yourself he’s excellent.”
“He only agreed to drum for us during the UK part of the tour.” I leave out the part that he’s kind of a dick.
“Jesse…”
“What am I supposed to tell the rest of the band? That Dragon just checked out on us? That he fucking lied to my face? That he took not only fentanyl but also let those bitches roofie him?”
“Jess, he took the Rohypnol too. He took it all knowingly. At least that’s what he finally remembers.”
“For fuck’s sake.” I hurl the phone at the wall.
I breathe in, trying to get my bearings. Then I pick up the phone.
“You there?” I demand.
“I’m here. Stop acting like a child, Jesse. You tell the band that Dragon and his doctors feel this is the best call for now.”
I shake my head. Rub my fingers through my hair.
I hope Derek is up for subbing in for the rest of the tour. I hope Jett is up for it too. After all, Emerald Phoenix pays their backup drummer’s bills, but the pay goes up if he has to actually go onstage.
“Callie, he’s making us look like a bunch of amateurs.”
“He feels terrible.”
“I don’t fucking care how he feels right now.”
“I’m surprised at you. Dragon told me personally that you of all people would understand.”
“You know? Maybe I would have. But he lied to me, Callie. He told me they drugged him. Besides, there’s a difference between understanding what Dragon has been through and understanding what’s at stake here for the band.”
“I know.” Callie pauses a moment. “But here’s the thing, Jess. No band is ever more important than the people who make it up.”
My anger dissipates a little then…but only a little. He still lied to my face, and I’m not sure I can forgive that…no matter what he and I have been through together. Sure, he said he didn’t remember, but—