Total pages in book: 73
Estimated words: 70518 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 353(@200wpm)___ 282(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 70518 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 353(@200wpm)___ 282(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
Romantic love was something else entirely.
Lucy had become my reason for smiling every day.
My reason for breathing.
I’d been alive before, and I’d continue to be a functional human being going forward, but it wasn’t the same as truly living. And I didn’t know how to come to terms with losing the best thing I’d ever had, even if it was for the best.
When my phone buzzed with a text from Lucy, my heart momentarily skipped a beat. Until I remembered how we’d gotten to this point.
Eric’s bloody face haunted my dreams.
Not because I felt guilt or regret, but because Lucy had seen me do it.
She had to be horrified she’d ever let a man like me touch her.
It didn’t seem fair that she wanted to say whatever was on her mind in person, but I’d let her if it was important to her. Just not yet.
I was still a little shell-shocked after everything that happened.
My phone buzzed again and I looked down to see a group text from a handful of my teammates.
Boone: This road trip is so lame without you, Kon. You comin’ back to work anytime soon?
Rory: You’re not missing anything—we have a curfew. Coach grounded the whole team. Said we weren’t to be trusted.
Wes: Which is hilarious considering all the shit you guys do that he doesn’t know about…
Rory: Who, me? I’m a fucking angel. What are you talking about?
Boone: Kon! Where the fuck are you? Hellooo?
I sighed, shaking my head as I tried to formulate a response.
Kon: I just got done working out. What are you assholes doing other than harassing me?
Boone: On a flight to Detroit. Then home tomorrow.
Kon: I’ll be at practice the following day.
Wes: Thank god. I don’t think Sanders knows what to do starting three games in a row. He’s a nervous wreck.
Kon: He’s young, but very talented. He’ll be fine. Give him a chance.
We talked for a few more minutes before I finally told them I had to shower, even though that was a lie. I had nowhere to go and nothing to do.
And it really fucking sucked.
I’d just gotten back from the gym the next morning when someone knocked on the door. The media had been camped out near my building for several days, waiting for a chance to talk to me, so only people who knew the code could get in. Sawyer knew it, of course, but he’d just been here yesterday, and my other friends like Boone and Rory were out of town.
I peered through the peephole and blew out a breath.
Lucy.
She knocked again, more impatiently this time and I slowly turned the dead bolt and opened the door.
“Lucy.” I wasn’t sure what to say or do, so I just stood there.
“You and I have to talk,” she said, looking up at me with annoyance in her eyes.
“I’m sorry. I just thought it best for us to have a little time to—”
“To what?” she demanded, brushing past me. “Wallow in self-pity?”
“I do not understand wallow.”
“To feel sorry for yourself. Is that what you’re doing here?” She made a sweeping motion with her hand as I closed the door behind us. The last thing I needed was for the neighbors to hear anything.
“I’m not doing anything,” I said, watching in confusion as she paced around my living room.
“I know you’ve been through a lot in your life,” she said, looking up at me, her blue eyes fixed on me intently. “And getting arrested probably didn’t help with your demons, but I thought we had something special.”
“We did, but—” I began.
“Why is there a but? Did we or didn’t we? Yes or no?”
“Yes.” I frowned, unsure where she was going with this.
“What did you do when Dmitri did what he did to Svetlana?”
“What?”
“Konstantin Volkov. Pay attention.” She walked up to me and poked her finger in my chest. “What did you do when that horrible man took your friend?”
“I found her.”
“And then?”
“I…killed him.”
“Because he was a vile man who did something really awful to an innocent young woman.”
I could only nod. I wasn’t sure what else to do.
“And I already knew this, right? You told me what you did to him. In great detail, if I recall.”
“Yes.” I looked down to where she still had a finger in my chest, wondering where she was going with this.
“Konstantin. I fell in love with you anyway. So why would you think that doing the same thing for me would somehow change things?”
We stood there for what seemed like a long time, just a few inches apart, her bright blue eyes burning into mine.
She’d fallen in love with me.
This gorgeous, smart, sexy, amazing woman loved me.
Still.
“Lucy.” I reached out and gently brushed her hair back off her shoulder, so I could rest my hand on the side of her neck. Her eyes fluttered closed for a moment, though she didn’t move otherwise. “You are…” I couldn’t articulate what I needed to say in English, so I said it in Russian. “The most resplendent woman I’ve ever met. You make me whole. You brought me to life. I can’t imagine going forward without you, but I also can’t imagine mixing my darkness with your light.”