Total pages in book: 191
Estimated words: 182070 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 910(@200wpm)___ 728(@250wpm)___ 607(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 182070 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 910(@200wpm)___ 728(@250wpm)___ 607(@300wpm)
I squeezed my arms to my sides to hold my boobs in. It was too good. Way too good.
I only let him get one pass before I sat back, still beside him. “Perfect, thank you.”
I glanced at him over my shoulder. He already had his hands in his lap, those light blue eyes on my face. I scooted over a little bit until we weren’t touching.
All right then.
He yawned, and then so did I.
“I’m gonna keep my phone right here just in case I fall asleep and Con calls, okay?” I asked him, patting the phone I set on my chest as I leaned back against the headboard.
It was maybe only a second later that he asked, “Bianca?”
“Huh?”
“You really thought I was perfect?”
I made a face to myself. “I said pretty much perfect. And that was a long time ago, when I was young and innocent.”
“What was wrong with me back then?”
I snorted and shot him a look. He was smiling. “You really want to do this? Yeah? First of all….”
He was already trying not to crack up.
“There were the girls. You dated just about all of them and broke all of their hearts from what I remember you and Boogie talking about.”
He groaned. “Never mind. I’m good. Forget I asked.”
It was my turn to laugh. “You’re sure?”
“Positive.”
I snorted.
Then after a moment, he said again, “Bianca?”
“Yeah?”
“You really almost married that asshole?”
My ex. “Yup.”
“Why?”
I made a face but didn’t look at him. “I don’t know. Because I liked him. He paid a lot of attention to me for a while, at least up until the end when he lost interest, and I guess I was lonely. He was cute. I don’t know, Snack Pack. I don’t mind being alone, but I hate being lonely. Do you know what I mean? I guess I just wanted someone around. Or at least, someone who would come back. That sounds really ungrateful now that I hear it out loud, because I know how many people love me but have their own lives, and I can’t expect them to make me the center of the world. I hope you get what I mean.”
If he looked at me, I had no idea, because he was only quiet for a moment before saying, “I get what you mean. I hated how much your parents left. I still don’t get how they could just stay away so much. And I remember how sad you were when Connie moved away to go to school after community college.”
“I didn’t get how they could leave so much either, not for a long time. I’ve tried talking to them about it, but all they said was that they thought I’d do better settled somewhere. That I was safe and in good hands. That I could ask Connie how much it sucked moving around every year. Honestly, even though I was perfectly fine without them, I still resent them a little for just leaving us with Mamá Lupe, even though I know how much they help other people with their work. It makes me feel guilty. Selfish. But you know, everyone has to go and live their lives and fulfill their destinies so… I try to focus on myself too. And I know better now than to expect too much from anyone.”
I peeked at him, and he was already looking at me.
“What about you? You’ve never met anyone you liked enough to think about settling down?” I asked.
His nostrils flared a little, but he shook his head. “Nah. There’s a lot of lovely women out there, but in Paw-Paw’s words, none of ’em have ever made me feel more than fondness for ’em. And you know, with the way my daddy treated Mama—disappearin’ as soon as he found out she was pregnant—I don’t want anybody wastin’ too much of their time on me if I’m not plannin’ on spendin’ too much time with them.” He shrugged. “And, Peewee, I don’t know if I could trust some somebody enough to feel that kinda way about ’em.”
I snickered, but I understood his point. “Well, maybe someday you’ll meet someone that you do want wasting all their time on you. Maybe it’s like football teams; you just have to find the right people, the right person. Someone worth your trust. But if you don’t, maybe one day we can be neighbors in a retirement home. We can have the future Baby Boogie come visit us.”
He chuckled. “I can already picture you harassin’ the male employees at the home, askin’ them about their nuts.”
I burst out laughing. “I only ask people I trust questions like that.”
“Uh-huh.”
“But for real… at least tell me, did they put makeup on your butt cheeks because they—”
His whole body was laughing. “You need to go to sleep.”
The last thing I remembered before dozing off was both of us laughing over his butt cheeks and why he wouldn’t just give me an answer. My cheeks had started hurting, I knew that much.