Total pages in book: 144
Estimated words: 140896 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 704(@200wpm)___ 564(@250wpm)___ 470(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 140896 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 704(@200wpm)___ 564(@250wpm)___ 470(@300wpm)
Maya and I have her same shade of blonde hair and a carbon copy of her eyes, nose, and lips.
She and Aunt Reina—Mom’s identical twin and Kill and Gareth’s mother—used to joke by saying we’re their mini-mes.
I’ve always known my mom to be a strong woman, undeterred and ruthless. Right now, however, there’s a furrow between her brows.
It’s late evening in New York, and I’ve caught her sitting at her vanity just after she’s finished her workday as a leader in the New York Bratva. That’s right. My mom is the only woman who’s climbed the ranks within a male-dominated organization and snatched a chair at the decision-making table.
She’s no less than my father in any way and made sure to teach us that being a woman isn’t a weakness—it should be a strength.
I used to think I was as assertive and powerful as she is, but after tonight’s incident, my confidence has taken a major hit.
Ever since I came back to the apartment I share with Maya, I’ve been blazing the lights in my room on the highest setting and lying in a fetal position on the bed, waiting for my parents to finish working.
My encounter with the new monster in my life has left a ball in my throat and a fire in my chest.
“What is it, baby?” Mom’s voice softens. “Is something wrong?”
Everything is wrong, Mom. The fear, the strange arousal, and my heart that won’t stop beating so fast.
Everything.
But I don’t say that and, instead, sign, “I just wanted to see your face and hear your voice.”
“Oh, baby.” She smiles, but it’s a tad forced. “I’m over the moon about being able to see your face after a long day.”
I let my lips curve the slightest bit. Most of my smiles are either forced or fake. The day I lost my voice, I also lost my smile.
“Has Aunt Reina been watering and taking care of Amun, Iris, and their family?” I sign.
“I don’t know what’s weirder. The fact that you name your plants or that the head of the family has a demon name. Besides, your Aunt Reina doesn’t need to come all the way here just to water them. The gardener or I could do it.”
“Don’t touch them, Mom. I don’t want them to catch a case of early death.”
“That’s rude.”
“Well, you really kill most plants you touch.”
“I’m sorry I don’t have the green thumb gene.” She smiles and leans closer to her phone. “What’s really wrong, Mia? Is there anything I can help with?”
Of course she’d know something is wrong. She always does.
“I feel a bit down,” I sign.
“Is there a reason behind this?”
“I had a panic attack in a dark place. I wanted to scream, but I couldn’t,” I sign, then hang my head.
There’s no way I can tell her about Landon. If I do, she’ll come here herself and rip off his dick, and then she might get in trouble with his influential family.
Besides, if she fixes my problems for me again, doesn’t that mean I will forever be weak?
“I’m so sorry, baby.” Her face, tone, and demeanor drip with love. “I wish I were there so I could give you a mama bear hug.”
“I’m fine.” Lie. “I’ll forget all about it in the morning.” More lies.
“It’s okay if you can’t forget about it, Mia.” She scoots closer. “Listen, I’ve been planning to broach this subject when you come back for a visit, but how about you give therapy another go?”
I link and interlink my fingers, then shake my head. “Therapy doesn’t work. I can’t speak.”
“Of course you can, baby. You just have to find the will to do it again.”
No, I can’t.
That part of me is trapped in an unremarkable capsule that’s hidden deep in the forest.
I’ve forgotten what my voice sounded like. But even if I do speak, puberty has already changed it. Sometimes, I think it’s probably like Maya’s, but deep inside me, a distant memory of it tells me there were some differences.
“We don’t want to push you,” Mom continues. “But have you considered that maybe you gave up on therapy way too soon?”
“We talked about this. Therapy was doing nothing for me and I hated it there. I hated dissecting myself in front of strangers and not getting any results.” My movements are jerkier, angrier, and more disturbed.
Like everything inside me tonight.
“Fine, I understand. I just want you to know that the option is always on the table.”
She’s about to say something else when a tall figure appears behind her and says in a soothing British accent, “What’s taking you so long, princess?”
My father’s face comes on the screen and I’m struck by how much I miss them both. I’m eighteen going on nineteen, but I still want to hug my parents for comfort.
Kyle Hunter is tall, dark, and classically handsome. Where Maya and I take after Mom and Aunt Reina, Nikolai resembles him. But while Dad appears sophisticated and elegant but is secretly a menace, Nikolai is openly a menace. He’s rougher around the edges and definitely doesn’t have Dad’s discreet modus operandi.